by Gulrukh Tausif

Created on: July 06, 2009   Last Updated: July 25, 2009

Telltale signs that you have become a father

In case the new sleeping arrangement, wakeful nights, and a sharp increase in baby products all over the house do not clue you in to your new status as a father, we have prepared a checklist that will convince you that you have indeed become one.

1) The block printing on your spotless white shirt is done by your baby's posterior and anterior ends.

2) You stop browsing HotWheels.com and start searching the index of AskDr.Warren.com. Instead of comparing prices of new car models by surfing cool websites, you begin to search for vaccines, colic, teething, and common baby ailments on parenting sites.

3)Your boss catches you asleep on your desk at least 5 times in a week and all you can mumble is "colicky baby."

4)Your colleagues discover and forward embarrassing photos of you in your laptop.....those in which you were wearing a bright, shiny, conical birthday hat and blowing a party blower.

5) Your chest expands when you hear cries of "Oh! What a handsome fellow!" and "Isn't he cute?" and deflates when you realize that the girls are referring to the bundle of joy in your arms and not to you.

6) You are suddenly being addressed as "Uncle" by cheeky teenagers in your neighborhood, during weddings and other family functions.

7) The sights, sounds and content of baby diapers become the topic of conversation at the dinner table.

8) Your mother in law seems to have moved in.

9) Another clue that you have entered the realm of fatherhood is when the TV remote control grows feet and is found anywhere in the house except the place where it should be. Need we tell that the cells compartment is always empty? Can't you see your child's remote controlled car zooming all across the room?

10) You will know that you are a father when you find your mobile phone in the bathtub, your slippers in the fridge and your watch on the teddy bear.

11) Another telltale sign of your parenthood is that you are found watching Baby Channel when the Twenty20 world Cup is going on. Any attempt to change the channel is met with a vehement, voluble wailing sound.

12) Tom and Jerry, Dora the Explorer and Sponge Bob Square Pants seem to be permanent residents of your house. Everything around you seems to have come straight out of Nick Jr. or Cartoon Network___ your bed sheets, towels, tooth brushes, crockery, posters on the walls and what not.

13) Instead of financial pages in newspapers and Forbes

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