by S. Colvin

Created on: July 05, 2009

Whether or not parents should be married before children are born is dependant upon each particular circumstance. Personal and religious beliefs as well as values play a big part in that decision. However, if marriage is important before children are born, this is not saying much for couple who choose to divorce.

Marriage is a major decision that takes place between couples who choose to spend their lives together. The two individuals are joined into one through commitment to love, sacrifice, honor, and compromise. Marriage in a relationship does not create better parents or result in better behaved children.

Children require stability, love, and nurturing. I don't believe this necessarily has to come from a married couple. This can come from any couple or individual that is capable of providing these qualities to any child. There are many loving unmarried couples that care for children in an exceptional manner.

Just because a couple is married before they have children does not ensure that the children will receive better care, more love, or increased stability. There are many marriages that are unstable as well as couples that are choosing to divorce. By stating marriage is important before children are born places a blind eye to the complications in relationships that affect children.

Rather than making the statement that marriage is important prior to child bearing, it should be said that couples and individuals should be prepared to make that decision and have a loving home for the child to be raised in. I know many couples that have been together for many years, but have decided not to take the vow of marriage. Even though they are not married, their children are subjected to parents that love them as well as each other every day.

This is not to say that marriage is not important. The same is true of couples that become pregnant and then rush to the alter before the bundle of joy arrives. Whether or not a couple is married before or after the child is born is essentially irrelevant. The couple, regardless of their status, should be capable to raising the child with love and support that is needed to ensure the child thrives and becomes the best of their potential.

The needs of a child include validation, affirmation, consideration, appreciation, nurturing, and stability. As long as these can be provided, the legal status of a couple or individual should not be the main focal point. Instead, the effort and energy should be placed in the well being of the children.

Learn more about this author, S. Colvin.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.