by Jess Howe

Created on: July 05, 2009

Grandma's teeth were falling out. Yvonne could see that from just entering the lair of the old vampire; sometimes great vision was a curse, not a blessing at all. She held her lavender nosegay up delicately, not wishing to offend. "Hello, Cailleach," she murmured.

Grandmother wrinkled her stubby nose. The winter winds howled outside. It was so cold in there, worse than the usual lair. Even the magical torches had icicle stalagmites. "I hate it when you call me that, girl. Why can't you speak like normal people, act normal?" She waved the words away with a gloved hand that was decorated with a huge ruby on one finger. "Never mind. I guess you have paid your suffering grandmother a visit because you want something. It's the only reason the old visit the young."

_She should be glad I didn't convert to Catholocism_, Yvonne thought with another sniff at her nosegay. Grandmother was practically rotting before her eyes, lace and velvet molding away, the dripping jewels that decorated the gown slipping to the floor to form a pool of treasure worthy of a dragon's den.

There was enough treasure, in fact, in that cave, to make five dragons happy - for a time, at least, till they started thinking the others' stuff was better and fought to the bitter end over possession of it all. "I came to visit, is all," Yvonne said sweetly.

The old woman spat out a tooth. "Bull!" she laughed. "You and your greedy sisters just want all my possessions - we are vampires, try as you might with your potions to keep blood-free. This is not a Live One's 'visit with granny', where you say hi and sit in uncomfortable chairs! I've seen those, I paid them when I was Live, before Caulder freed me. Prove to me that you are worthy, and you can have this cave when I am dust. But do not lie to me, girl. I'm too old for such nonsense."

"I'm not here for that; remember I told you I gave it up a year ago." Which was true. Yvonne had been drinking blood from hospital banks and practicing Wicca in secret till she finally came out to her family. She smiled sincerely. "I really did just come to visit you. I always did love you, in my own way."

Grandmother looked at her with her head cocked, a frown on her face. "I am old, almost gone," she said. "Did you come to steal my knowledge, then?"

_Vampires are so suspicious_, Yvonne thought. "What if I told you I could cure you?"

"Hah! I know you're full of it now - what do you have up those voluminous sleeves, then? A stake? A cross? Holy

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