by Monda Mahmoud

Created on: July 04, 2009   Last Updated: July 19, 2009

We state as a matter of fact that we can never really know someone. It's only when it dawns on you that you're included in the context of that phrase - as the party that doesn't really know - that you tend to become more attentive. Suddenly the phrase becomes an eye-opener.

Everyone wears a mask at one point in their lives. It's inevitable. Some people wear masks year round. There's the perfectionist, the know-it-all, the life of the party dude who craves attention, and the universally famous back-stabbing jerk. A classic mask is I'm-a-nice-guy, and the most cliched one is I'm-a-soft-and-delicate girl.

Some masks are more subtle though. Kids become irresistibly charming when they set their minds on getting something they want, or they can be a real pain and cry non-stop. We often put a fake smile on our faces and act like nothing is wrong. We hide behind a concerned face, and make people believe we're listening.

Why do we wear those masks?

Why is it difficult for us to say what we want?

Why can't we just be?

Are the masks imposed on us?

The most common explanation for wearing masks is self protection. We sense the need for shelter. Masks help us build our own defenses. They can give us power, or at least the illusion of power, at times when we feel powerless. Even an angry voice can elicit a tough exterior. Sometimes we wear a mask to shield ourselves from getting hurt. We've been proverbially attacked countless times from acts of deceit and betrayal.

We're born into the world naked and exposed, totally vulnerable and dependent on people around us. Masks change appearances and disguise our weaknesses. With our mask, we forge a display of confidence. We claim to master skills to handle things, we don't need anyone and we don't need any help. We appear self reliant and we feel safe.

We also wear masks to hide flaws that embarrass us, and imperfections we're ashamed of. We paint ourselves a prettier face to the world, covering up the true us out of fear. We fear rejection and we fear someone will make fun of us for what we believe, what we think or how we feel. We try to flaunt what we do not possess. We desperately try to fit in. The need to belong exerts pressure on us. We're struggling with insecurities. A mask gives us an opportunity to become something more attractive. We pretend to be a make-believe version of our character, one with the right attitude and intellect. We relish the occasion to impress; especially on a crowd whose approval we yearn

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>