by Tami Beck

Created on: July 04, 2009

Can a person really make up for past mistakes? On the surface, it seems like a simple question, with "yes" as the obvious answer. After all, if one has the insight to realize that a mistake has been made, and the desire to rectify the situation, then it should be within one's ability to make up for past mistakes. Which holds true in the case of minor infractions, such as a forgotten phone call, or a miscommunication. Of course, some mistakes take longer to make up for than others, depending upon the nature and severity of that mistake. But if one takes responsibility, holds themselves accountable for the consequences of their error, and patiently works toward making amends, naturally you might think that one can really make up for past mistakes.

Yet, many times the negative effects of one's mistake go far beneath the surface of personal consequences. More lives are affected than just the erring person. A cheating spouse, a family member or friends betrayal, might all be honest mistakes, a one time occurrence, without calculation or ill-intent. Even so, the ripple effect of that honest mistake is far-reaching, devastating lives close to the center and casting a negative shadow on the relationships within that social circle. Regardless of how sincerely one regrets that mistake, it just can't be undone. Trust has been lost, trust that was lost in a single moment, but that will take much longer to earn back. Sadly, shattered trust is rarely regained, as the injured party deals with the wounds caused by that honest mistake. The cheaters may lose a spouse, family member or friend, in spite of their regret and steadfast efforts to repair the damage that their honest mistake has caused. Sometimes a spouse or family member may be forgiving, willing to learn to trust again, but the children or other family members may not be so quick to forgive or trust again. Division splits the core of the family, and cannot be healed, even when a person is working very hard to make up for that past mistake.

Can a person really make up for past mistakes? Yes, sometimes it is possible. But more often than not, the past cannot be made up for. Mistakes may be deeply regretted, but can never be erased, the past cannot be changed. But, whether or not one can make up for past mistakes, the best thing a person can do is to own up to those mistakes, mend what can be mended, and make peace with the rest. We can't always make up for past mistakes, but we can learn from them, taking the lessons with us as we journey to a brighter tomorrow.

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