When it comes to interference in a couple's marriage mothers are pros. Naturally, the maternal meddlers, each have their own reasons. When asked "why?" most moms claimed they interfere, either out of love or necessity. When asked to clarify this answer, one mother's reply was, "All I want in this life is for my child to be happy." Still, another answers, "if I don't intervene, my kid will make a mess of her life." This mom honestly believes this is true. From her view, her offspring would greatly benefit from the expert guidance of an older, wiser, and more experienced hand.
Maybe Mom has made great sacrifices throughout her years of motherhood in order to indulge her little one. When the same little one (now grown) has had a fairytale-like existence her whole life, Mom becomes fearful that her adult child can't handle the truth of the real world. She realizes she has overindulged her child, and now feels it necessary to spend the rest of her years being a barrier to cushion her delicate flower from the harsh elements of reality.
On the surface, moms who meddle have their child's happiness, and best interest at heart. Why then, do even the best moms might meddle, from time to time? For some mothers, her own child will always be the precious little thing, which played around her knees, needed her kisses on boo-boos, and help with tying his shoes. In her mind, her child is so helpless; he couldn't possibly be in a successful marriage without Mommy's help.
Some mothers seem to be blinded to the reality that little Jon-Jon is now 6'1, weighs 210 pounds, ties his own shoes, and would much rather be called anything, other than Little Jon-Jon. This mother considers her motherhood as, the "glory days" and is apprehensive about advancing to the here and now. A reasonable guess would be; this mom meddles because she still wants to feel needed. With some mothers it would appear, she just can't help herself.
After the most recent family fiasco, Mom has seen the error of her ways. She has made her pleas and promises of reformation.
For a while, she stays true to her word and fades into the sunset. The married couple enjoys their peaceful existence but soon begin to wonder, where could Mom be? No need to worry, Mom has been out and about, doing her own thing, riding the waves on her little boat, the S.S. Interloper. She has been drifting around until one day she drifts out into the ocean, otherwise known as, 'Your Business.'
"Oops! Didn't see you docked there." No surprise, she has now dropped anchor and begins to check your boat for barnacles or needed repairs. It seems as if she truly cannot help herself. Could it be possible, this mom is bored?
The thing which surprises many couples is when they learn, their mother interferes in their marriage because they have invited her to. The accused offspring will usually begin to ague against this theory once informed that they had a hand in Mom's worrisome behavior. Ask your meddling mom how she knew, about a particular problem in a certain area of your marriage. She will probably reveal, it was you who mentioned it on the phone one day. Most likely, it was after a little spat you had with your spouse. You felt the need to go to the place you have always felt loved, protected, and comforted. It's understandable.
However, later that night after you and your loved one have worked through your problems, had make-up sex, and are sleeping soundly; across town, Mom is in her own bed and is still worried, and wide awake. Just as all mothers throughout the animal kingdom, Mom feels the natural urge to protect her cub; she frets, and tries to think of how she can help. She has no idea everything with you is fine now, because you only call her when you need something.You forget to give her a quick call to ease her mind and let her know the disagreement has been resolved.
One year from now, after you have long forgotten, dumping your problems on your mother and wondering why she's not really fond of your mate; the unsavory traits you acknowledged to your mother are quite fresh in her mind. Your mother will not have forgotten the complaints and shortcomings you revealed about your spouse.
It is a wonderful thing to call Mom to say, "I love you" and have a chat. But don't run to her to vent all your little disagreements, unless you want her input.