by Rosemarie Makhmaltchi

Created on: February 05, 2007   Last Updated: April 18, 2007

The Happier Life Guide: Lesson 2 The "Two Strikes, You're Out" Relationship Rule

Ask around, and you'll find that relationships account for a large bit of the total stress and unhappiness in people's lives. Friends, boyfriends, girlfriends, spouses, family members, and coworkers can seriously get on your nerves and even do things that emotionally or physically hurt you. This article will focus on the "Two Strikes, You're Out" relationship rule that I feel is a good tool for dealing with selfish and hurtful people. This tool may not be the best for use on spouses, family members, or coworkers, but for all other relationships, it should work. It's a preventative measure.

Growing up, I saw my mom struggling with her drugged up, womanizing, physically abusive boyfriend, and although I was only 8 or 9 years old, I always wondered why she let him treat her like that. She knew he was cheating on her, and he didn't respect her, but she let him continue to stay in her house anyway. It didn't make any sense to me then, and it still doesn't now. Since then, she's done the same thing with one other man, and my younger sister is currently in a relationship with a horrible and disgusting guy who doesn't respect her either. What's up with that? Maybe they each got in too deep with those guys, and fell in love them with the passage of time. My mom actually thought about marrying both of the jerks I just mentioned. That would have been a HUGE mistake! This is why I created the "Two Strikes, You're Out" relationship rule.

Many men and women feel like they must have a lover, or life isn't complete. I know our society and pop culture tells us this, but what's the point in having a lover or significant other, or even just a friend, if they treat you like garbage? There are billions of people on this planet, and with the Internet, you have access to millions of them. You don't have to settle for the first jerk that comes along.

Keep yourself from growing too attached to nutcases and dangerous people by noticing the signs of a budding abusive relationship:

-Does the person put you down? Do they call you names like "stupid," "fat," "ugly," or "worthless"? Do they tell you that no one else could ever love you? Do they feed your own negative self-image? Do they purposefully say things that make you feel bad about yourself? Do they criticize you to make themselves feel better or look better? Do they tell you you'll never amount to anything? Do they shoot down your dreams without being kind

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