by M.A. Dal Cero

Created on: June 29, 2009

Coping with the death of a friend or classmate is an extremely difficult experience for children to endure. Depending upon a child's age and stage of emotional development, he or she may or may not be capable of dealing with the wide range of emotions that death leaves in its wake. It is important to keep in mind that the death of a child close to their own age will typically cause children to come to the realization that death can strike at any age. As a result, many children develop the fear that they will soon die as well. Therefore, it is essential for parents to be a constant source of support, comfort, and information for their children as they go through the grieving process.

The following of several ways to help your child cope with the death of a friend:

~ Explain death to a younger child in understandable terms.

First and foremost, a child's ability to understand death will vary depending on his or her age. Also, it is common for very young children to have difficulty comprehending that all living people and things will inevitably die, and that death is a permanent condition. Therefore, it is often helpful to explain death to your child in a manner that he or she will easily understand, and to be completely honest with him or her. Depending upon the manner in which your child's friend died, be sure to explain to your child, in a gentle fashion, what caused the friend's death. For example, if your son or daughter's friend died as the result of an illness, you might tell him or her that the child's body was simply broken or not working properly, and could not be fixed. If the death was due to an unfortunate accident, you can explain that his or her friend was hurt very badly, and that, again, the people at the hospital were not able to repair the child's broken body. Further, while it may be tempting to use common phrases in place of the word "death", such as "passed away" or "moved on", remember that such terms may cause a child additional confusion. However, if you child is comforted by the belief that his or her friend is now in Heaven, then do not deny them the peace of mind which comes from the idea of an afterlife.

~ Be patient with your child's questions.

Death represents the "Great Unknown", and for this reason, all human beings have a multitude of questions about death. You can expect that your child will feel the need to ask you many questions as he or she attempts to reach a level of understanding regarding the death of

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>