by Karen Witter

Created on: June 29, 2009   Last Updated: July 01, 2009

Preschoolers are creatures of habit. The world is a big and busy place over which they have little to no control. Schedules are the friend of small children. They set the boundaries for each day and bring the world down to a size that is manageable for the under 5 crowd. Bedtime is no exception.

Bedtime is one of the most dreaded times of day, by young children and parents alike. The clock strikes bedtime and the little angel child becomes the little terrorist child. A bedtime ritual can be the key to soothing that small, writhing, wild thing. Having a set plan for wrapping up the day, that is the same every day, is invaluable because it helps the child calm down at the end of each day, helps the child know what is expected of him or her, and helps develop the parent-child bond.

The preschool age child does not have the ability to internally prepare to wind down from the day. Left to their own devices, they go until they crash and burn. Rather than waiting for meltdown, a bedtime routine offers the external support and assistance a young child needs to bring a day to a successful close. The process doesn't need to be anything elaborate, but it does need to be a program that helps the child know what is coming, what to expect next, and transition from high energy mode to relax mode.

Understanding the expectations of their parents is important to preschoolers. Although this isn't always apparent in their behavior, it is a part of their make-up. Young children struggle with finding their place in the world and within the family. Anything a parent can do to ease this struggle will greatly help the child and will be rewarded with increased cooperation from the child. A schedule at bedtime will ease the struggle by specifically letting the child know what is expected of him and when. Deciding to read a bedtime story every night to preschoolers will not cure all their behavioral problems, but it will bring more peace than before to bedtime.

With the help of a bedtime ritual, the end of the day can become a time of great parent-child bonding. Investing time at the end of every day with preschoolers sends them the message that they are important to you, that you want to spend time with them, and that they are loved. Winding down with a bath or singing time helps some of the angst of the day slip away for everyone, and can turn into something the whole family looks forward to.

Finding a ritual that works can take some time and experimentation. But do not give up. The rewards in the end are well worth the challenge at the beginning.

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