by Kristin Lee

Created on: June 25, 2009   Last Updated: June 27, 2009

As a young woman I often wondered, who am I? I had spent far too long living the way everyone else thought I should, but it never felt right to me. I knew in my heart there had to be more. Anger and fear colored my days, but the most depressing feeling was that of being lost. It was as if the pieces that created my life were scattered and if the wind blew strong enough those pieces would be lost forever, I would be lost forever.

I can't recall the exact moment that I came to my decision that enough is enough. But I do remember that as soon as I took the time to find myself, my life began to change.

I stopped buying into the dogma that surrounded me. I discarded what I felt in my heart was not true. From the depths of my soul I developed a belief system that I could carry with me for the rest of my life. Instead of turning outward to solve my problems, I looked at myself. This was not an easy process; in fact it was one of the most frightening things I've ever done. But I was propelled forward by the belief that I was moving towards a brighter, happier life; and I was.

So how did I do it? How did I find myself? I knew that my first and most important step on this journey was to start with a clean slate. I had been through a lot in my life that had contributed to a sense of abandon. If I was really going to move forward I had to let go of all that hurt. I had to forget what everyone else thought, and figure out what I thought, what I wanted. I had spent 20 plus years pleasing others and putting my needs on the sideline. Changing my thoughts so that I didn't feel extreme guilt each time I put myself first was excruciating. But as I came into my own, it became one of the most liberating things I have ever done. Cleaning our minds of mental clutter and our hearts of past anguish allows us to open ourselves up to the gifts that are yet to come.

One of the most powerful things I did during my journey was to find an affirmation. Affirmations can be any positive statement that gives you hope and it can change from day to day. My first affirmation was: Always have faith. I stood in front of the mirror everyday and repeated that affirmation to myself. It felt fake at first, because I was not sure what faith meant to me. But in time, as I began to piece my puzzle together, I began to believe my affirmation. The greater my faith grew the better I felt. But I still had to determine what it was I had faith in.

To figure that out I had to venture towards my second

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