by Mj Ferruzza

Created on: June 25, 2009

There are certain relationships that have been created out of circumstance and necessity. Quite the opposite can be said for a long distance relationship. They are often costly, hard to maintain, difficult to manage, open to mistrust, but when they work, they work. The world has grown smaller with the Internet and telecommunications. Starting up and keeping a friendship going has been made easier. You could literally meet a new person on line in the morning and by the evening know everything about them and their life. Texting, web cams, cell phones, instant messages, they have all changed the world and especially the rules on dating. But is a long distance romantic relationship disingenuous? To some, maybe. But quite a few have come to the realization that our one true love may not live in our town, city, state or even our country. This is the crux of starting and maintaining a relationship of distance.

Here are 5 steps in surviving a long distance relationship. Each step works in harmony with the others. If you can establish the basis of a good long distance love using 1 or more of these steps, your relationship may just work out. If not, you may want to rethink your exact feelings about your partner.

#1 Trust. People in a long distance relationship must have a bit more of a trusting nature. This would be a control freaks nightmare, yet still remarkably, controlling people do maintain these relationships. A long distance relationship tends to put both partners out of contact for some period of time, trust fills the gaps.

#2 Honesty. Why lie when it comes to long distance. There is a great chance of getting caught at some point and that has only led to waste of time, energy and money. No one ever asks their partners to be a saint, but openness keeps the relationship on sure footing.

#3 Time clocks... throw them out. If you are only testing the water to see if the relationship is going to work as a trial or test, it probably won't.

#4 Scheduling. This is probably the most important aspect of the long distance relationship. Being there for phone calls, chats, and most important visits works best if they are maintained and fulfilled. "I couldn't find you" doesn't cut it after the 10th or 20th time.

#5 Whose your new friend? Having separate residences in separate places opens both partners to the possibility of a new set of friends and associates. These come with their own set of entanglements and constraints. Be aware, your partner can not think of only you 100% of the time. Have a problem with that, re-read steps 1 and 2.

A long distance relationship, like any relationship, must be nurtured. This must occur even if one or both partners enjoy the space and freedom that the distance creates for them. To really survive in a long distance relationship is to keep your partner closer to your heart than by their phone.

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