by Pam Boyd

Created on: June 25, 2009   Last Updated: June 29, 2009

So many times I have missed the miracle of attracting the right people into my life because I was taking myself too seriously. I liked being around people who didn't do this and I knew I had to get better at not taking myself so seriously to attract people of character into my own life. But this is much easier said than done. It was essential not to be so caught up in my own pain, my own stuff, and my own desired outcomes.

I learned this lesson the hard way more than once. In one particularly painful incident many years ago, my boyfriend had been away at college and was coming home for the summer. I was to meet him at the airport and boy, was I excited! I expected a euphoric Hallmark-card-greeting moment complete with passionate hugs and kisses! Instead, it was so bloody awkward! I felt like he hardly even looked at me and he just talked about himself the entire way home. I had expected him to tell me how much he loved me, to compliment me, tell me how beautiful I was, notice my hair, my outfit, etc., etc., but he just seemed so wrapped up in himself.

Little did I know at the time that I was part of the problem and that I held the power to make that meeting special. If I could redo that scene I would change my focus from how is he going to treat me? to how can I respond to him and make him feel loved, accepted, and appreciated?

In the movie Vanilla Sky, there is a scene where Tom Cruise meets Penelope Cruz at a party and later comments that she was the only guileless beauty in New York City. His character was drawn to her even though she was simple, not dressed for the party, not polished like his current girlfriend, and most significantly, not trying to impress him. Cameron Diaz's character called her a moth and was stunned that this moth had the power she didn't have. She couldn't grasp the weight of guileless.

Guileless, says it all. Without deceit of any kind, the dictionary says. When we meet someone with this quality we don't forget them. Even Jesus praised someone for this in an unlikely encounter included in the Bible.

When Nathaniel heard about Jesus from a friend, he had said candidly, Can anything good come out of Nazareth? Upon meeting Nathaniel later, Jesus referenced the comment and announced Nathaniel's arrival in this manner, Look! An Israelite indeed in whom there is no guile!

What an endorsement! Jesus liked it that Nathaniel was being himself and not trying to be spiritual or impress him. He obviously appreciated

• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• Next Page >>