by E. Tillery

Created on: June 23, 2009   Last Updated: June 25, 2009

So you have a headache, haven't slept in days, your baby's screaming and all you can think is why do I have to be doing this by myself? You feel like you are at your wits end, but somehow you manage to pull through yet another mini-crisis as I call them and continue to love and appreciate the little person you've brought into the world. I'm currently raising a very busy toddler by myself. There are days when I just want to lie on the floor and have a temper tantrum like a 2 year old, but I don't. Why? Because I know that I'm my child's everything. I can't fall apart. I have someone depending on me. That thought gets me through some of the most challenging moments of being a single mom.

CHALLENGE 1: Using up the majority of your sick days to pick up your child from daycare because they have shown any one of the number of things that gets your child sent home early (i.e. fever, vomiting). On some occasions you will also have the pleasure of staying home the next day to make sure they aren't contagious.

CHALLENGE 2: Finding a doctor and/or dentist that has evening hours so you don't have to take time off for their various wellness checks.

CHALLENGE 3: Having enough money that you are able to save. Being a single mom or any style parent for that matter means you have to have a contingency plan. You need to always have a little extra stashed away for the unplanned emergency room visit or the summer fees they want you to pay at daycare. Not to mention any unplanned events that may happen to you.

CHALLENGE 4: Remaining calm when you've started to reach your breaking point. Things at work are rough, you're exhausted and you still have to come home and tend to a laundry list of items. Not only do you need to make dinner, but you have a pile of laundry, you need to do your bath time and bed time routine and you want to try and get a few minutes to yourself to relax and breath.

CHALLENGE 5: Coping with the fact that you are a single parent. Whether you are a single parent by choice or by circumstance, it's hard no matter how you cut it. You need to find peace in the notion that you're never going to be given something you can't handle. Sometimes you just have to take a minute step back reassess.

While there are many challenges to being a single mom, I feel in a way I'm the lucky one. I have a deep and special bond with my daughter. We know each other very well and even though she's a toddler I consider myself her parent and her friend. I hope that by being so close she will always know that I've done everything and given all I can to make her life as joyous as possible. I'm happy to be a parent single or not.

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