When you choose comedy as a career you get to say all the things that the rest of us are thinking. The mark of a good comedian is his or her ability to connect with the audience, not just with the joke, but with the issue. There are some lines of comedy that will go on forever. A good comic monologue can become like a cult classic film. Every time someone gets on the grill at a cookout, someone else yells, "Gus don't burn the house down". Every person in the park, despite age, race, or religion, knows that Gus was the topic of Eddie Murphy's Delirious. The laughter ensues. The terms "close talker" and "man hands" were made famous by Jerry Seinfeld's antics in his self-titled sitcom.
There are funny people and their are hilarious people, but the people on this list not only leave you in gut wrenching laughter, but they have a knack for making us realize the truth and laugh about it. Here are my favorites and their funniest (helium appropriate) lines.
HONORABLE MENTION: Dave Chappell, Jack Black, and David Spade
#10 Jeff Foxworthy- Everyone knew about rednecks but no one brought it home the way Foxworthy did in his Redneck series of books, shows, and comic CDs. There is always something about self deprecating humor that brings the house down. Favorite Line: "You might be a redneck if your dog and your wallet are both on a chain."
#9 DL Hughley-Speaking of self-deprecation, no one does it like DL. He's short, a high school drop-out, and bitterly honest about race, politics, and religion. Favorite Line: "I used to work for BET but they pay 'weekly'....very weakly".
#8 J. Anthony Brown- Classic old school comedy and tell it like it is co-host of morning radio. His stand-up on DL Hughley presents is much quoted in social circles. Favorite Line: "How do you make a bomb in your mama's house and she not know it. You couldn't make a peanut butter sandwich in my mother's house without her knowing."
#7 Ellen Degeneres- The dancing is enough to put her on the top ten list but her stand-up routines are even funnier. She's real and can relate to her audience while making us laugh at ourselves. Favorite Line: "You know when you are watching the commercial and you hear Do you feel tired? Are you ever sad? Do some things make you irritable? And they just keep going until they get you. Yes! I have that!"
#6 Bill Maher- Though you have to be far left to totally agree with him, funny man Maher brings light to some of the most important topics and points out the idiocy around us. Favorite line: "We don't need a 700 foot wall on the Mexican border, we need a 700 foot WAL-MART."
#5 Bill Cosby- Good old fashion humor, clean and family friendly. He's lost his puddin' pop charm in recent years but no one can forget Fat Albert and the gang. Favorite Line: He says to his children, "We're rich. You have nothing."
#4 Wanda Sykes- Hilarious! Raw! and speaks the truth on issues affecting women and society as a whole. Favorite Line: "Forget stocks. You need to invest your money in weed. The price of weed never goes down."
#3 Eddie Murphy- From Delirious to Raw, he is versatile enough to be Dr. Doolittle, Donkey, and Mushu the kimodo dragon. He's funny enough to make tears come to your eyes. Favorite Line: "Lilliannnnnnnn, cannot use the telephone. If the house is burning down, you better be burnt up in it because you [darn] sure can't use the phone to call the fire department."
#2 Jerry Seinfeld- There is no end to his ability to find humor in absolutely nothing. He built an entire franchise on a show about "nothing". Favorite Line: "So because of the phone machine, what you can have is two people that don't really ever want to talk, and the phone machine is like this relationship respirator..." Why do we do this?
And the #1 Comedian of the modern age.... Chris Rock- In my opinion the funniest guy on the planet. He keeps reminding us just how silly we are as Americans. He's not afraid to be Marty in Madagascar then return to the stage. It's difficult to pick a favorite line so I'll go with... Favorite line: "Who's more racist black people or white people? BLACK people! Because we hate *&$* too."