by Joan Inong

Created on: June 22, 2009

Insecurity is one of the biggest problem makers in romantic relationships. Not only does it hinder the progress of the relationship as a whole, but it limits how each person will feel about the other. If you know that you are insecure and it may be ruining your relationship, you should try to stop being as insecure fast.

People who are insecure usually have personal problems first. For instance, they may have lack of confidence, they may have had an unhappy childhood, they may have had previous, bad relationships, or they may just be naturally jealous people. No one, however, plans on being insecure. It seems that the most interesting part about insecurity is that it is unknown until the person's relationships are almost on the brink of ruin.

Insecurity has a few negative consequences, all of which are serious and tremendous in size. They will affect you, even if it is your partner who is the insecure one. First, insecurity will lead to more intense jealousy. Jealousy itself is a vice that needs to be avoided. It is the ruin of anyone who feels it. But, insecure people will be naturally jealous because they think that everything is out to get them. Their situation is much like the situation of a schizophrenic who thinks that the world is out to get him. This delusion can only lead to broken relationships.

Secondly, insecurity will lead to other, larger problems. For instance, a husband who is insecure believes that his wife will cheat on him whenever she goes out. Furthermore, she cannot go out with her friends, she can't go shopping by herself, and she can't even take the kids to school. Her husband has become the controller of her life and their relationship will end, whether she comes out of it or not.

Most people who are insecure will take the blame on themselves if their partners leave them. That is a problem that may lead to personal issues and even suicide. Insecurity, therefore, not only breeds hate for others but also breeds hate in one's self. At first, insecurity may seem like a minor problem. But, even if it is a minor problem, it can lead to bigger problems.

Insecurity can only be "cured" once the person has acknowledged his or her importance in the relationship. If the person learns that a relationship is a two-person commitment, then perhaps his insecurity will slowly fade. If not, the insecurity will only lead to the destruction of the relationship and perhaps the insecure person himself.

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