by Danielle Zarcaro

Created on: June 21, 2009   Last Updated: June 23, 2009

This is not an exclusive, 'yes'. It's the equivalent of the n-word for African Americans. 'Fag' has become an insult used to target anyone of any sexual orientation. It uses the idea of homosexuality as an insult because the idea is that no one would want to be viewed as a homosexual. "That's so gay" has replaced the previous "That's so retarted." Being 'retarted' - or mentally ill - is equated with negativity. Since 'gay' has directly replaced 'retarted', it is placed in exactly the same situation, surrounded by negativity.

So what does the targeted group do? Turn the connotation of the word (or words) around. People in close circles of friendships might call the homosexual member of that circle a fag, but the reason for using the word is completely different than the previously-mentioned insult. If he (I use 'he' because 'fag' is usually associated with homosexual men) has displayed a 'gay' trait or action, his friends might say something like "You're such a fag." He might even say so about himself. It is used as a compliment, a sense of pride about his individuality. The same goes for the feminine insult 'dyke'.

I heard a comedienne use the word in one of her jokes and felt completely comfortable with it. As a member of the homosexual community and in the playful and joking manner that surrounds the stand-up comedy profession, she is being humorous but true. A straight comedian would have to establish publicly in some way that he or she is a friend to the homosexual community, before being able to use the word.

Those who are not a part of the homosexual community, would have to be careful about using the word. It's ok for a girl to look in the mirror and call herself ugly - no one will be offended, and girls say it all the time. But it is not ok for someone else to call that girl ugly - she'll scratch your eyes out. Same goes for 'fag', 'dyke', and most other insults. True, the connotation of the word has been formed by those intending to use it as an insult, but the community has embraced the word and turned it into a positive thing. But only to those who know when it is appropriate to use it.

Not every negative word has been embraced in this way, and unfortunately our society will continue to attribute words with insult and negativity. But hopefully minority groups will continue to embrace themselves and combat those around them by simply absorbing the insults.

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