by Sun Meilan

Created on: June 18, 2009   Last Updated: December 23, 2011

Suicide is a very emotive subject that seems to bring out deeply differing opinions. For me, it is a very personal one. Suffering from severe clinical depression, there have been a number of occasions when I have tried, obviously unsuccessfully, to end my life. Was it my personal right? I believe that it was. However, that doesn't mean that I am not glad that I am still alive, or that I believe that someone contemplating suicide should be left to their own devices.

Many believe that those who commit suicide are selfish. Selfish for thinking only of themselves and not those who are left behind. There is no doubt that the feelings that lead to suicide are selfish. When one is so low that they believe no-one or nothing can make things better, the tendency to think of oneself and oneself only is natural. The belief that the world would be a much better place for everyone else without oneself bringing everybody down is overwhelming. Such is the nature of depression that it plays tricks on the mind. Calling such thoughts selfish is not helping matters; in fact, it is downright dangerous to suggest to someone who is suicidal that they are selfish - it may just be the final reason they need to stop inflicting pain on others by dying.

In the society that we live in, at least in the Western world, an individual has the right to chose how he/she wants to live. They also have the right to choose how they die. There are people in this world who suffer unnecessarily; whether from physical illness and pain, or from mental illness. Is it fair that other people, wanting to keep friends and relatives alive, try to put a stop to their death by locking them up in an institution? Think about it - who is it that is actually being selfish? I am not religious and do not answer to a higher power; if someone else does, then that is their prerogative. However, it doesn't mean they can or should dictate their feelings onto someone else who has no such beliefs.

Suicide is a personal right. No-one has the right to tell anyone else how they should live their life, or end it, and no-one should be punished for attempting suicide. However, anyone thinking about suicide should be given the opportunity and time to weigh up all the options. All too often, a brief period of depression can warp the mind into thinking that there is no hope, when in actual fact, there is nearly always hope. If you know someone you think is contemplating suicide, don't just leave them to it; fight for them. They may not want your advice, but in their lowest moments, your words may just reach them and stop them from putting an end to it all. Remind them that people care for them. Just don't tell them that they are being selfish.

You can never be entirely responsible for another human being, but you can at least try to alter their thought process. Your help may mean more to the person in question than you can ever know. Be vigilant, but most of all, don't be patronising. For anyone reading this that may be contemplating suicide; wait and seek help from a medical practitioner, because there is hope, however unlikely it may seem, and you won't always feel like this. For anyone who has lost a loved one to suicide: Remember that, whether it was their right to die or not, they almost certainly didn't plan to deliberately hurt you. Rather, they had an illness that altered their thought processes and, rightly or wrongly, thought that the world would be a better place without them

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