by Sharon A. Walsh

Created on: June 16, 2009   Last Updated: June 19, 2009

Stalking is more common and damaging than we realize. According to the national center for victims of crime, stalking commonly occurs in intimate relationships that are about to end. The statistics show that fifty nine percent of women and thirty percent of men are stalked by an intimate partner. The statistics also show that eighty seven percent of stalkers are men. Eighty one percent of women who were stalked by an intimate partner were also physically assaulted by them.

How damaging is stalking? According to the national center for victims of crime, those who are stalked suffer from anxiety, insomnia, social dysfunction and severe depression. Stalking causes extreme emotional stress due to the endless fear one is subjected to. Stalking can cause emotional damage that can last a lifetime. Here it is, ten years later, and I'm still fearing the sounds of people knocking on doors and walking through dried up leaves or snow. I always took these sounds for granted, that is, until I was the target of a stalker for five long years.

My nightmare began in the winter, shortly after we have moved into our home, just three months after having our fourth child. The first incident occurred while my husband and I were sleeping in our bedroom on the first floor. I was awakened by someone knocking loudly on the front door at about 3 o'clock in the morning. Frightened, I woke up my husband and he went to see who was at the door. He quickly opened the door, but no one was there. To lessen my fear, my husband convinced me that it was possibly kids just playing around. Feeling reassured by his response, I went back to sleep. The knocking continued, however, and I was no longer convinced that it was just kids playing around. We called the police but they could not do much because we could identify who was causing the disturbance.

My marriage, unfortunately, ended two years later. I stayed in the house with the children until things were settled. My mother and sister lived with during this time. The stalking continued but the harassment was getting worse. Not only was this stalker knocking at the front door but he was also knocking on the windows in different parts of the house. The stalker's presence was unpredictable. He would come around on random days and at different time frames and would harass me about three to four times a week. Sound was the only way he would let me know of his presence. I can hear him whistling, knocking on my windows and doors and walking through

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