by Rachel Howells

Created on: June 15, 2009   Last Updated: March 23, 2010

Positive attachment provides children with an anchor. When they are cast out into the world, this anchor gives them the security they need to freely explore and learn about their social environment without losing their way. The process of attachment is instinctual and begins immediately. However, you can aid and strengthen the natural course of attachment through close proximity, responsiveness and sensitivity.

Proximity: Keep Baby Close

Newborns come into the world with a basic need for close human contact. The obvious and functional reason for this is their vulnerability and helplessness. Without someone to feed, love and protect them, babies would not survive. Newborns are genetically programmed to communicate and draw their mothers or primary caregivers close to them mainly through crying, cooing and smiling.

Babies will attach to whoever attends to their needs and cares for them the most. This is partially why even children who are abused will still want to stay with an abusive parent. The quality of attachment is therefore important. When parents do not respond to a baby's cries or leaves a baby alone to cry it out in a locked nursery, it compromises trust. On the other hand, babies who are kept close and responded to immediately, soon learn that they can depend on their caretakers. This in turn, creates a sense of comfort and security, which eventually develops into self-confidence.

Ways to Keep Baby Close

♦ Nurse your Baby

Nursing your baby right after birth and continuing to nurse for at least the first year is one of the best ways to foster a strong bond with your baby. When your baby nurses, she or he is physically attached to you, but it also encourages emotional attachment. When babies nurse, they can look up at you, babble and watch your reaction, as well as reach a hand out to touch you. Outside of the womb, a baby cannot get much closer to his or her mother than at the breast.

♦ Bottle Feed as If Nursing

Of course, breastfeeding is not always possible. When this is the case and bottle-feeding is the only option, you can still foster a positive bond with your baby during feedings. Cradle the baby close to you as if nursing when you offer the bottle; smile and speak in soothing tones as your baby feeds. All of these simple behaviors will promote a warm and comforting feeling between you and your baby.

♦ Sleep near your baby

If sleeping with a newborn makes you too uncomfortable, an alternative is to have your baby

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