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which can lead to lowered self esteem. Of course you do need to explain the reasoning behind your disciplining so that the child understands that what he/she has done is wrong but chose your words carefully. There is no need to directly attack your child by saying words such as 'you are bad for XYZ' or 'I bet other children don't behave as badly as you'. Instead point out what has upset you about your child's actions, explain what you want your child to do in future and emphasise a time when your child did it correctly for example 'you're not meant to drop litter, bins are here for a reason, we need to keep the place tidy, next time make sure you put it in the bin yourself, last week when you did that without even asking I was very impressed and happy with you!'

Important life lessons: Stress to your children that is the taking part that counts and not the winning. Sense of failure can really affect a child's self esteem and so letting them know that you do not always have to be number one.

Do remember though that self esteem does change on a day to day basis so there is always the chance to work on building self esteem so don't worry if one day your child seems to be down, you can do all you can to help build his/her self esteem back up!

Learn more about this author, Laura Marshall.
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