by Catherine Thomas

Created on: June 13, 2009

Children are a great blessing from God. However I have seen some of my friends marriages go south after the birth of their children. Children definitely change the dynamics of a marriage. Some married couples choose to have one of the parents become a stay at home parent, others both choose to stay in their careers. Children demand a lot of time, and this can lead to fatigue among their parents. Some parents get so wrapped up in their children and their children's activities that they neglect the relationship that is the most important to them, their marriage. There are some important steps parents need to take to prevent their marriage from lacking romance and becoming a mundane routine.

When babies are first born they require a lot of time. Many new parents spend so much time with their babies, they neglect their spouse. If you are a stay at home mom or dad, you try to get all the household chores done while the baby is napping throughout the day. Sleep is interrupted throughout the night, leading to fatigue. This is the first mistake of new parents. They neglect taking care of themselves, then when the baby is fast asleep and the two of you are alone, you both fall back on your pillows and fall asleep. You fall into the not tonight I'm too tired mode.

Babies become toddlers, and now you are spending all your time chasing them around, putting up all the child safety devices, getting wrapped up in all the firsts. Your days seem to whirlwind around your precious toddler, sometimes a new sibling enters the picture. So now you spend your days chasing a toddler, and taking care of a newborn. Once again you spend all your waking hours tending to your children and their needs. The conversations you have with your spouse all revolve around the children and their care. You rarely expand past the how was your day? conversations. Sex is something that is, rarely happening because you always seem to have a child in your bed. You are not sure how this has become a nightly routine but you can't seem to break it.

Now the toddlers are school age, and you spend your time running them to baseball practice, ballet, and piano lessons. Your conversations with your spouse have become who is picking Johnny up from practice, who is taking Sally to piano, and who is picking up dinner. Your weeknights are filled with practices and games. You have Friday night off so you make it family night, you spend the evening with your spouse and children playing games, watching movies,

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