by Dionne Mahaffey

Created on: June 11, 2009

Let's drop the twisted sister routine!

It's the dirty little secret of sisterhood. In our supposedly enlightened and evolved working world, where women have more power than ever, something is lurking that we don't even want to whisper about. It's so sinister and subversive (for some; though others actually gleefully boast about it!) that when it's brought up, it's met with outright denial. It is the backstabbing and betrayal perpetrated against women - by women.

Instead of supporting each other, we're sabotaging each other. And, maybe most disheartening of all is that as more females are rising through the ranks and shattering glass ceilings in record numbers, this damaging dynamic is actually getting worse.

And it's not restricted to the career arena. We're continuing to have no qualms about going after other women's men. I'm sure you read a few years ago about Shania Twain's husband dumping her for one of her close friends ... and we all know that no matter how beautiful a couple they are ... that Angelina is allegedly guilty of messing around with Brad Pitt when he was still married!

But it's not a trend confined to Celebrities. Ordinary women have no compunction about flirting with their friends' dates and mates. And some are taking it a lot further than that.

What's going on? Why are we poisonous opponents willing to poach husbands and push our female colleagues to fail?

Experts say the reason is a "scarcity of opportunity" mindset, something we believe - at least in the primal part of our brains. We may be making it - hey, we've got the corner office! Still, there's a sense there's only room for a few of us. And it is true that most organizations still have far more men at the top than women. So, we believe in our subconscious that our success can only come at the expense of our sisters. And now it's resulted in a pretty toxic situation. I'm sure you've experienced it, and I definitely have. One of the clients I "coach" was involved in an office tangle, a horrible experience and actually a classic example, according to Susan Shapiro Barash, author of "Tripping the Prom Queen: The Truth About Female Rivalry" (St. Martin's Griffin).

Below is an excerpt of a letter regarding her office tangle:

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Dear Life Coach: My "enemy" started out as a friend. She was the self-described smartest girl in the office - and the woman in charge of the biggest department in a very small, traditional and male-dominated organization. When I arrived, from a much

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