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Created on: June 06, 2009
It can be both. However, it tends to be an illusion for the most part. You will have to trust your own intuition to see whether Internet intimacy is real or just a beautifully dressed illusion. But, that is easier said than done. The thing is that you two are not seeing each other's faces unless there are Internet cameras involved. Most of us do want to believe that Internet intimacy is real. But, we are solely relying on our emotions in that respect. Asides from emotions, we must learn how to exercise the use of logic. It is logic that keeps us from doing things we may regret in the future.
How do you tell whether it is real or faux?
You are going to have to give it time. You will have to take it one day at a time. Plus, you have to consider the fact that this is intimacy over the Internet. For the most part, you should consider this an illusion. However, this is not to knock on romantic relationships taking place over the Internet. In fact, there are many wonderful relationships that originated from the Internet. However, one has to be weary.
The thing is, it is easy to hide ones identity on the Internet. There is the ease of anonymity. You can pretty much be who you want to be. I have met people that exploit that for their own self-gain.
For the most part, you should have the pre-notion that this is an illusion. You really cannot consider this a real relationship until the two of you actually meet in person. Until then, the relationship is pretty much not real. What is your online partner doing while s/he is not logged on? Who knows?
Even if the two of you meet in real life, the person could be someone else. Unfortunately, the Internet is the new place for all of society's degenerates to gather and congregate. It is a place that allows all sorts of predators to prey upon the weak and unsuspecting. They try to gain your trust. Once they gain your trust, they go in for the "kill."
There is the risk involved especially when physically meeting the person. The person could be a rapist, a pedophile, a serial killer, or something far worse. One needs to take the "Craig's List killer" as an example. But, that is very much a worst case scenario for the most part.
In any normal scenario, for all you know, the person sitting in front of the other monitor could be yanking your chain. That also goes if you two meet in real life. In all respects, you hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Still, it is best to play it safe. Again, assume that it is an illusion until the two of you meet in real life. However, do not get into a long-distance online relationship. It only makes things far more complicated.
For regular relationships, take it one day at a time. If you two never meet in real life, consider it as an illusion. If you two agree to meet in real life, make sure that it is in a public setting. That way, you can take the time to get to know the person better. Over time, you can tell whether or not it is real. But, prepare for the possibility that it could be an illusion.
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