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Created on: June 05, 2009
Once upon a long ago
Once upon a long ago
In a far away that we all know
Lived a big big bad of stories old
Who'd suck your blood and steal your soul.
-
But times are not now as they were
Nor maidens sadly quite as fair
Mobs, once vicious, now lack style
And knights of old are all too rare.
-
"So bored I am!" cries creature foul
"It's hard sometimes to fake a scowl
Hell, I had a lass last week tied up with tape
Who didn't even seek to escape!
She said my dungeon was, "well cool"
To tell the truth, I just don't know what to do?!"
-
"That's okay sir, I'm here to help
These days the kids want real street cred
You better lose those horns and cape
They really are quite out of date."
-
"To be a baddie these days, sir
Why not try a nice coat made out of fur?
Wear a T-shirt that says "I eat meat"
And wear croc leather upon your feet."
-
"Or maybe you'd like to be hip?
Get a piercing sir right on your .... lip
Ditch the leathers too, they're so not "it"
I suggest stretched jeans that don't quite fit."
-
"With this image altered, I'm quite sure
You'll have rediscovered your allure
More frightening than the bogey man
The most feared evil in the land!"
Learn more about this author, Simon Wright.
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