by Denisa Howe

Created on: June 04, 2009

Once again, I headed out for my morning walk. This morning was a little different. Usually I feel the trill and energy of contentment. I might even have the slobbering tears of one sorry for thoughts or actions of the night before. No, I don't drink a lot and I am never drunk, but life can give you the same feeling. This morning, I am neither sad, nor full of desire. A stand still waiting, I suppose.

The sun played peel-a-boo at me, hiding behind he gray clouds and popping out laughing in the wind. I ignored the temptation to smile. I glanced at the tan leaves arguing with the grass. The leaves covered the small patches of grass trying to show spring. In my mind I could hear the leaves say, "Its not your time yet, go back to sleep." The green blades of grass would shake her finger and say, "Now you listen here, we are not going through this again. Every year you resist letting go. It's my turn, time for you to dry up and blow away." Normally thoughts like this would cause me to grin. Today I trudged my feet over the top of both of them and walked on.

The wind kept sending breezes of chill towards me, probably mad because I refused to play with them. I pulled my jacket tighter on my way. I found an old tree that lay fallen. Its bark was crumbling off, yet it still provided and gave. It was a new home to different micro animals and shelter to others. Even the deer could scratch their heads and sharpen their horns here. I sat down and rested my will.

From the back of my mind, a song floated forward. The sad melody of Send In The Clowns grew louder and louder. I hummed it aloud, which sent the squirrels scattering. I love the melody of this song, the softness and sadness equal parts. I could even listen to it without the words and feel the intense emotions. I leaned back and lost myself in the song. I felt a tug at the hem of my jeans. Great the dog is demanding attention, after he bluntly refused to come with me earlier.

I opened my eyes, expecting to see a black lab slobbering on my hiking boots. Instead, a clown sat at my feet and untied my boot. "Hey, what are you doing?" The clown's mustard yellow hair titled back so I could see his face. His eyebrows were exaggerated, with the color of plum on his eyelids. A tear slowly fell from his left eye. The tear was a bubble of water, it too was in the color of plum, and it fell slowly down his face. His clown nose was red, but softer in color the most. The outline of his mouth was yellow to match his hair. He just sat

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