9 of 25

Write now Article Tools

Page 2 of 3

on the impeccable wisdom of Stephen Covey, let's familiarize ourselves with the levels of dependency. There's dependency, independence, co-dependency and interdependency. Total dependency is the state of infancy. An infant supplies none of his own needs. The first need that an infant learns to fulfill is self-pacifying: he locates his thumb. In the absence of self-reliance, the infant's only recourse is to cry out, to communicate. An addict of any description supplies none of his own happiness. He is dependent upon some external source for gratification and pacification.

Codependency enables an addict to remain addicted to this role because the codependent is equally addicted to the enabling role. They avoid the upheaval from changing roles and growing to a higher level of maturity. If the addict is addicted to dishing out abuse, then the codependent is addicted to receiving abuse. Neither is doing the work on themselves (where it matters), to end the abuse. They are not imagining themselves in different roles and therefore are not aligning their desires and deeds towards changing their roles. All the world is a stage [5] and all the men and women merely actors. What we need to remember is that we CAN and MUST choose roles based upon our importance as individuals. If we don't choose our roles consciously [6], then our roles will be chosen for us. The danger of rule by majority voting, starts to crest over the horizon.

Independence is the next level to which we transition. Here we decide our role is to provide for ourselves. A healthy measure of egocentricity and selfishness is required. It's when we realize that we are not someone else, not living someone else's life. We are not sovereign over our neighbors, parents, friends, enemies or anyone else. We are not living in someone else's body. We are not seeing the world through someone else's eyes. Our own life is our own and sole responsibility. It is a challenging stage to master. Master it we must or we can never truthfully say, I know myself. Parts will remain foreign territory. Gnothi Seauton.

Interdependence is to co-dependence as federal union [7] is to incorporating union [8]. A true federal union recognizes the integrity and wholeness of the individual members, or states. It's a marriage of whole parties. An incorporating union is a merger in which one is subsumed into the other. These levels are better described on the individual level in Stephen Covey's "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" and

• << previous page
• 1
• 2
• 3
• next page >>

Add your voice

Know something about Republication or Democrat: Which do you choose and why?
We want to hear your view. Write now!