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Created on: June 03, 2009 Last Updated: January 09, 2012
First dates can be very scary ,you hear yourself say things that you wish you could take back, but the words seem to have a mind of their own. You apologize after every sentence and instead of enjoying the moment, you keep evaluating every thing you say. The outcome of the first date determines whether there is a second date, and people are pressured far beyond what is necessary. Lear to relax and be yourself are the first rules of a successful first date.
A recent survey was done, and the people surveyed confessed that if it were based on their first date only, they would not have ended up with the person they are with now. Take it easy, and remember that you are not the only one trying to make an impression. First dates are sometimes awkward and uncomfortable, but there are a few things you can do to make this a very relaxing time for both of you.
1. Make yourself appealing by having a shower, spend time on your appearance and smell
2. Wear comfortable clothing so that during the date you are not constantly adjusting and pulling. If you are not comfortable get a second opinion before you leave the house, and when possible find out what the dress code is for the place you are going
3. Guys try to make the first date a casual affair, go somewhere that allows you to relax ; stay away from fancy restaurants,this can place pressure on an individual who is not comfortable in such a setting
4. Ladies please be ready if you are being picked up; and guys please call the lady at least 40 minutes before you pick her up. This is your way of telling her you are on your way.
5. If it can be helped, do not leave straight from work or school. This may not allow you enough time to freshen up, and prepare yourself for the date
6. Ladies do not assume that the young man is covering the bill. Always be prepared to go dutch. Anything can go wrong. Guys make sure you are able to pay the bill, and do not tell her to order whatever she wants; when you know you have limited resources.
7. Do not let your first date be the first conversation you are having with each other. Before the date, try to have at least two opportunities to speak to each other. This will give you something to talk about on the date. This is not always possible, but if it is a blind date, try to get as much info as possible from the friend who is setting up this date.
8. Try not to manipulate the conversation. If you find the other person is being quiet ask open ended questions. Those that cannot be answered with one word or a single sentence.
9. Hold back some information to keep the person interested in you. Try to keep the high school jokes to a minimum. The person is more interested in you, not your friends
10. Guys even if you want to kiss the young lady, try to show restraint. Ladies never kiss on the first date; it sends a very wrong message. It's okay if he knows you are attracted to him, but let him know that it takes a little more than a good meal and a nice moonlit night to get intimate with you.
Remember the first date can be the door to many more dates. Even if you are not interested in a second date, let the person leave wanting more.
Learn more about this author, Andrea Montack.
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