by Michael S. Romano

Created on: June 01, 2009   Last Updated: July 26, 2011

It is Laundry Day and, I'm out of Tokens

There comes a time in every man's life when he must eventually gather up his belongings, pack a bag or two, kiss mom goodbye, shake the old man's hand, and head out the door. No, he's not heading off to stay with Uncle Sam and the several thousands of his other nieces and nephews. He's a man now, for he finally has "his own place". Actually, he's starting that wonderful time of life known as "bachelorhood". Yes! The freedom of coming and going when he pleases, staying up late at night to watch the "sports channel" (That's what he would tell his parents he was doing, but little did he know they knew otherwise), having friends over to the wee-hours of the morning, and so on. Though more often than not, this new man-about-town has forgotten one import part of life at home: mom.

Mom was there to make sure he was up in time for work or school. She was there at the kitchen table with a hearty breakfast waiting for him. When he returned home from his daily adventures she had the supper ready, and she was a faithful recipient for him to spill his woe's on. But, the most important thing was that she made sure his laundry was well cleaned, pressed, tailored, folded, and put away nicely where he could easily obtain them when needed.

After a pre-determined amount of time, which is usually equal to if not shorter than the quantity of clothing our young adventurer takes with him, our new man will soon find out that one Saturday morning he'll be waking up to find not the usual empty laundry basket, placed neatly upright in the corner of the room, but a sight much, much more alien to him. It is here he observes a basket, nearly busting at the seams, overflowing with shirts, pants, socks, and other sorts of undergarments, which may or may not belong solely to him; the details of such an evening will be left up to the reader's imagination. Much like the old saying: trying to fit ten pounds of crap in a five pound bag.

Have no fears, my friends, for our "Stevie Home-maker" will quickly learn the secret that every newly-initiated bachelor will learn, and that is the "Multi-Echelon Laundry Classification System". Well, if you are reading this you either are, or know someone much like our Stevie Home-maker. So I feel it is necessary for me to pass on to you this secret information, which has saved nearly every Brother of the Bachelorhood from the common doom of a man: calling his mommy for help with his laundry.

The system was founded

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