by Katelyn Wescoat

Created on: May 30, 2009

* A bit about a crazy man, who believes holding a normal conversation entails repeating the same phrases over and over again, repeating them quietly to himself...and to anyone else who cares to listen. *

-The Mad Musings and Ravings of an Utterly (No, Slightly) Mad Muser-

I'm not completely stark, raving mad. Just a little bit. Know what I mean? Nudge, nudge. That's what she does. Wink, wink. Give a little blink. Know what I mean? Know how it seems, know how it seems? Remember now, I am a completely normal human being, capable of normal conversation on a daily basis. Nudge, nudge. Fudge, fudge. Know what I mean?

Righty now. Capable of a normal conversation? Yes, yes, yes. Of course I'm no-, I am am.

What is a normal conversation again? Where you gabble about the opposite sex and...ooh, Ya know what I mean, know what I mean?

Where was I? Ah yes. Normal conversation. Well, first you would start off with a bubble bath. Mind you, you absolutely positutely, must, must, must use cherry scented Disney Princess bubble bath. Bibbidy bubbly babiddy bloob. Know what I mean, mean, eh?

And we are now about to participate in the first ever World Polka Dot Spotting Contest. Whoever first spots the...Nudge, nduge...loses first prize, and ultimately FAILS. Wait, is that right? No, no, no. Yes, yes, yes.

She was the first girl I ever fell in love with. She had blonde hair, and blue eyes. Was her hair naturally blonde? Blonde, blonde, blonde. Naturally, she said, naturally, she said. But I didn't believe her then, and I still don't. Do you believe her. Hmm? Hmm? Hmm?

I told you already! I am not going out today to ride our imaginary ponies, Rob! Peonies, peonies, see, ah see, see?

Oh yes. I forgot to introduce you all to Rob. He's my best friend. You wanna know why? *Whispers* It's a secret. You can't let him know I told you, all right, righty, righty right? Okay. Rob's my best friend. He and I are from somewhere else. *an imaginary world*

NOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Don't kill my pet bunny. He's the Killer Rabbit, and must be saved. Rob, I'm gonna get you!

Nudge, nudge. Wink, wink. Say no more. Know not what I mean?

*Man goes running off into the distance, chasing down the Killer Rabbit.*

-I have paraphrased sections of Monty Python's "Nudge, Nudge Sketch," and obviously, added quite a bit of my own.

Learn more about this author, Katelyn Wescoat.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.