by Melissa Roe

Created on: May 27, 2009

Harmless sibling rivalry is something that each individual can laugh about and forget. It is only when the rivalry grows, and starts involving anger and resentment that sibling rivalry can cause great trouble in family relationships.

Jealousy amongst siblings is fairly common and it is something that can be expected throughout childhood and teenage years. Once one child begins receiving more praise or recognition from parents, friends, society, or peers, the other child's green jealousy monster begins to grow. The determination to stand out above a brother or sister becomes a priority. In these early stages of life, it is harmless and sibling rivalry can be overcome to continue a healthy sibling relationship.

If the competition continues into adult hood that is when it starts interfering with family relationships. Not only is the relationship between the two siblings affected, but the family as a whole becomes involved and feels the stress.

Sometimes when people have low self confidence they need the praise and recognition of other people to boost their self esteem and make them feel like they are better than anyone else. People who have these serious mental issues do not care if they hurt other people in the process of making themselves look better. All they care about is being on top.

Adult siblings can go overboard trying to out do each other. If one brother does something good, and is recognized or talked highly of by family members, the other brother may feel less important, or a sense of worthlessness. This can result in animosity between the two brothers. If one brother buys a house, the other brother may try to purchase a bigger more expensive house. This could lead to financial trouble, or resentment.

Adult children may go as far as putting down their brother or sister and talking bad about them to parents and other family members. Not everyone is perfect, and someone who is jealous will play up the downfalls of others by putting them down. This will only cause hurt and angry feelings between siblings. Gossiping and bad talking your brother or sister will also put other family members in the middle of a resentful situation.

Family gatherings can become very difficult to attend. Most of the time, the rivalry will involve exaggeration of tall tales and bragging about everything . Family members will get tired of hearing the stories associated with the two rivals. Events may happen less often, or not at all because the family doesn't want to be involved.

Spouses and children of the rivals will also be affected. Children, especially, can sense the tension and competitiveness in a parent. The child may also start bragging about things to their cousins, making the rivalry now not just between siblings, but between families.

Sibling rivalry, continued into adulthood, can damage relationships between everyone in the family. Not only the parents, but the children, and other family members become involved, making the situation a very tense and uncomfortable one for everyone. It will cause people to become distant, and loose respect for each other.

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