by M.

Created on: May 25, 2009

Matters of the heart

Child support is support for the child/children, a supplemental income; to supplement the absent parent's financial responsibility.

I also want to make the point that the courts set the legal standard amount for the absent parent to pay. Court does not dictate the extra that is needed to raise our children.
I have been a single parent for ten years and now I am a soon to be divorced parent.. I am tired and drained emotionally, spiritually and financially but I will do my best and fight through whatever may stand in my way to provide for my children. God has provided and He will continue to provide. I work 10 to 12 hours on my full time job and I have re-entered college to get my degree. My children are my life and I intend to provide them with a secure start in life.

My husband of thirteen years simply walked out with no communication and or support. I have applied for food stamps and have been denied. I do not believe the welfare system is designed for individuals who are trying hard to make it. We had to leave our residence before eviction was filed. To retain a lawyer is another fee but I am digressing. Child support is the fine line between middle class and welfare.

I have learned that being a parent is that you can not be selfish - You have to do what is necessary to maintain a full life for your children. They did not ask to be here, it is only fair for us to protect them. No matter how tired I am I have to get up, plant my feet on the floor and move in a positive direction. I do not know what is ahead in court because my ex is self-employed but when I reflect back I have been supporting my children for a while by myself so I know whatever the court decides I know that the legal financial obligation from him will only be a part of what my children need. A parent cannot rely on child support even when the court intervenes. When a parent is legally told to pay child support you may or may not receive it on a consistent basis.

I refuse to become bitter and I refuse to tear down my ex in front of my children. Life is about moving forward. I invite the court system to decide the amount that he has to contribute for our two children. If that is not enough then like our grandmothers, and mothers did in the past I will take up the slack. My point is child support should not be seen as income to raise your children on but as a supplemental income only. Time spent with your children is a commodity no one can put a price on.

Learn more about this author, M..
Click here to send this author comments or questions.