by Nicolas Pavlos

Created on: February 01, 2007   Last Updated: May 09, 2007

I think I may have come up with a way to satisfy our country's increasing hunger for 'reality' programs and gambling, while at the same time providing a hefty source of revenue for the increasingly debt-ridden federal government. That's right, a National Lottery. It would be called "America Wins!", and this is how it would work:

Similar in concept to some recent sci-fi films and some long forgotten short stories, "America Wins!" would begin simply. The newly created federal Department of the Lottery would oversee the printing of lottery tickets, which would then go on sale at post offices around the country. Tickets would cost two dollars each, but only those US citizens who could prove that they were between the ages of 20 and 60 would be able to purchase them. Similar to traditional lotteries, there would be no limit to the number of tickets that one individual could buy. Lottery tickets would be sold for exactly two months, and then after an evening of live entertainment (televised throughout the country on one lucky major network), the winners would be randomly chosen from the millions of lottery tickets that had been purchased throughout the country.

You heard it right. The winners... plural. Twenty of them, in fact, because here's where "America Wins" would get interesting for the viewing and voting public- and start to generate some serious cheddar for the Fed. The twenty winners, a veritable cross-section of the American public (albeit between the ages of 20 and 60), would now begin serious competition for the real prize. The opening Lottery is simply the process by which the 'candidates' would be selected.

Now, bear with me, because this gets a little intricate in its brilliant simplicity. The 20 'candidates' would all then be flown to Los Angeles- that center of the entertainment industry- where they would get down to the serious work of convincing the voting American public why they deserve half of the money made on the lottery ticket sales. Yes, I said half, and let me quickly explain. One dollar of every ticket purchased would go straight to the federal government- an entertainment tax, if you like, but essentially an incentive for continued federal regulation (and participation) in the game.

Now, I know it sounds steep, but remember that even 50% of a modest nationwide sale of 100 million tickets at two bucks each is still 100 million dollars. Oh, and did I mention that those winnings would be tax free? That's right. When the government's involved

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