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The Main Reasons We Fear Ageing

It seems that at least 42% of people fear ageing. That's nearly half of our population in the UK. Yet, like death, age is an inevitable part of our existence. We cannot NOT age just as we have to die. So the only way to treat those two elements of our existence is to accept them as willingly, happily and joyously as we do life because ALL THREE come as a package. We cannot have any one without the other. The minute we accept life, we accept ageing and death. If we constantly remind ourselves of that, and live each day as it comes, life will be more enjoyable because we won't spend it worrying and stressing. We'll spend it on living to the best of our ability.

It seems that we fear ageing because it is usually associated with illnesses and ill health rather than anything vibrant, energetic and sexy. We also see many people who have not aged very well and immediately assume that we will age like that too, forgetting our own individuality. But there is no single blueprint for ageing. Ageing begins in the mind and the body then follows suit so that, quite simply, we age how we think. It means that people with 'fragile', 'victimlike' or negative thought processes, who write themselves off at certain ages, or fear the actual process, are going to age quite differently, and more rapidly, from those who feel strong, confident, aspirational, worthy and enhanced.

Furthermore, society brainwashes us into the desirability of being young through its focus on the young, especially by the media and entertainment industries, and we accept it meekly instead of asserting our presence. We also worry about ageing skin, being incapacitated by our age and having to retire and lose our status, job and friends. Most important, we worry about being excluded, unwanted and insignificant. So instead of welcoming old age as another important phase of our life, where we can set the rules to please ourselves, we dread it and fear it, which then affects the quality of that life in a negative way.

Yet it is not the actual age we are which should be the focus of our lives but the age we choose to live and wish to be. Personally, I can't wait to celebrate my 62nd birthday next year because age has never dictated my life. It certainly provided a direction but it isn't the route. My new motto of "Over-Sixty, Sexy, Savvy and Soaring!" shows where I'm going! What a time I am having being older because I do not live according to the fears or limitations of others. My own beliefs and expectations guide my life. I am determined to make the most of every precious day and, interestingly, people tend to think that I am at least 20 years younger, and treat me accordingly. So the only predictable box I am ever going to be slotted into is the one at my funeral!

As we age inside our heads first and our bodies dutifully follow, how we are perceived is entirely personal. Chronologically, we might be a certain age, but it is up to each one of us how old we really wish to be in our attitude and actions, because that's how we will be treated by everyone else. We have this incredible developing world dominated by technology yet are still back there somewhere, trying to use old mindsets around ageing to cope with the new innovations. Unless we move into the 21st century too, especially in our thinking about age and how to treat it, we will be missing out on an awful lot of talent and resources while living a needlessly sorrowful life dictated purely by fear!

Learn more about this author, Elaine Sihera.
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