by Holly Huffstutler

Created on: May 20, 2009   Last Updated: November 28, 2009

A girl's guide to moving back to live with her parents, or in other words, how to avoid regression.

I have to preface this by saying that this is an art that I am still trying to figure out. I recently graduated college. As I did not get a well paying job the second my last final ended, I packed up everything I had taken across several state lines and enjoyed a long road trip with the ultimate destination of my parent's guest room for an undetermined length of time.

I have now been here for almost six months as my unpaid internship and Helium articles really don't pay enough for rent. I'm lucky enough to like my parents and I've lived on my own apartment pre-college so there's very little teenage and post teenage drama, but it has still been a learning experience.

My main piece of advice is to not allow yourself to regress. Hopefully you have emotionally matured and are therefore different than when you last lived with them (By the way, if this isn't true perhaps you really should move the hell out of your parent's house) but the natural temptation for you and your parents will be to fall back into old patterns. Resist that lazy impulse and try not to get into the same arguments you had with your mom, dad or little brother as you had when you were fifteen. Quietly demand to be treated like an adult (the act of living under their roof notwithstanding) by acting like one.

Acting like an adult with your parents requires both the setting of boundaries and letting go of your inner sulky teenager.

Have your own life and don't let your reintegration to the family home change your personal routine too much. Adjustments must be made, yes, but don't turn into either a Stepford daughter or a hermit.

Be a helpful addition to your parent's house. It's a very nice thing they are doing for you, whether you are paying some rent to them or not, so try not to be a drain on their resources or a source of unexpressed anger and resentment. Help around the house by taking over some housework that you know that your parents have trouble finding time for and that you don't hate doing. This might not need to be said but: clean your room and perhaps other rooms as well.

And perhaps most importantly, plan to leave at some point. Don't jump into an apartment lease before its financially viable but have an exit strategy even if you are using your time in the family home to decide your next move.

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