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they get while the course of true love is failing to run smooth. Their shallow materialism is briefly amusing on its first manifestation ("the two 'Ls' - Love and Labels"), but as references to $400 pairs of shoes and horribly expensive bags abound, it gets more and more appalling.

You can draw brief satisfaction from the fact that the film isn't burdened by any obvious celebrity cameos, but basically the most dramatic thing that happens is that a wedding is delayed by 20 minutes when the groom has butterflies.

Ah yes, that's something else that really got on my wick - the structure is all wrong. Ignoring the fact that the film is FAR too long, it all builds to a climax at the afore-mentioned wedding, and then drags on and on and on and on. For about another 90 minutes. When, eventually, it is all over, it just sort of peters to a halt, and I found myself on the edge of the seat... in case I was being premature and had another ten minutes of brainrot ahead of me. Tighter structure and pacing would have helped with this.

In addition, the sudden appearance of Jennifer Hudson as an assistant should really have come much earlier in the film. Or it should have been cut altogether. The sudden appearance of a sassy black girl merely rams home the point that this is a horribly smug, white, middle-class environment. And the fact the girl in question's primary role is to make other people coffee... it leaves an unpleasant taste in the mouth. Saint Louise from St Louis was a bit of a revelation, she opened my eyes to the exact reason I'd always despised the TV series.

There's also a trip to Mexico around the film's halfway point. This is a particularly unwelcome nod to the traditions of TV comedies making the switch to the big screen. In the UK, the norm is for the regular cast to go on holiday to Spain together (viciously sent up by the League of Gentlemen in their 'League of Gentlemen's Apocalypse'). Sure enough, within minutes we have some wacky mariachis and a dodgy water gag. Oh, and explicitly racist attitudes from Charlotte who refuses to consume anything other than chocolate pudding throughout their holiday. Bless.

I really can't think of anything I liked about this film, beyond the lack of celebrity cameos and the pillow-humping dog. Lazily written, badly acted, and no cinematic vision whatsoever (presumably the film has a bigger budget than the TV version, but there's little sign of it beyond filming locations in Mexico and a beach which we'll assume is in California). Avoid, avoid, avoid.

Learn more about this author, Kenneth Andrews.
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