by Dawn Hawkins

Created on: May 19, 2009

Keeping control of your children has great advantages. You are more aware of what they are doing on a daily basis and you think that you know everything about them. This may come to a shock to parents who have too much control over their children's lives, but there are things that you don't know about them.

There is such a thing as having too much control in a child's life. There is a fine line between just enough and way too much. Parents need to be aware of the dangers involved when being overly watchful of their children's activities.

Here are some examples where too much control could lead to lack of control:

Individuality

Children are going to find their personal style of doing things with or without you. If you constantly tell a child no when he/she is just trying to be his/herself is very dangerous behavior. It encourages the child to find something away from you that allows him/her to convey who and what he/she is.

For instance: A girl wants to wear a top that is slightly low cut but not so low that everything might fall out. You have a problem with any material that doesn't cover her from head to toe. You tell her to change her clothes. She goes to her bedroom, changes her clothes and slips the top into her book bag. As soon as you are out of sight, she changes to the top that she likes.

You just lost control of your daughter. She tried to be herself with you and you shut her down even though there really was nothing wrong with what she wanted to wear. You tried to impose clothing on her that she doesn't like and doesn't want to be seen in. She fought back the only way she knew how. She lied to you.

Apron Strings That Strangle

It is important to know what your children are doing. It can help keep your child out of dangerous situations. Don't be too over zealous in knowing every detail of her life. Give her some breathing room. Chances are, if you let go a little bit, she will come to you with all the information you need. What is even better is that it will be the truth that you are hearing, not just what she thinks you want to hear.

If you don't allow your children a little bit of freedom, it encourages them to sneak to do those things that you would forbid them to do. Example: Your son was invited to a party but he fears that you won't allow him to go. Nothing bad will be going on but you always think the worst. Your son tells you to go to he wants to go to the mall for a while. You

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