by Guy

Created on: May 18, 2009

Ultrasounds of conscience

I was approached by one of my little freshman the other day. They had an ultrasound in hand and was wanting me to say something.

What did they expect me to say?

Hey! It is nice that your irresponsibility has grown into a real life that will hold you back from having a life worth living.

Or maybe this,

Wow! I bet you are wondering how this little one growing inside you is really going to do to your teenage life!

Or

I am sorry that I know that you have no idea how your life has just been thrown away to the minute by minute care of your child.

Yeah, I know. It seems that it would be mean to say any one of these things but yet, I would not be able to help myself. I just can't be happy about a child coming to the world to a teenage mother. I can't give any reinforcement of a conception in which I know will be riddled with hardship and questions. A life that will start with wondering how they came to be and then end with why they were not able to have a normal life that had parents that got married and loved each other with a picket fence and a dog in the backyard. A life that meant having to fight with mom and dad about not being able to go out with this guy or that on the sole reason of knowing that they "only wanted one thing."

It won't happen since their own mom will be doing just that - seeing all these guys that only want one thing. Guys that want that one thing not only because they are all guys but also that she has a kid in which they want no ties to. They will struggle to make ends meet while working one job after another not being able to pay bills and losing a job here for staying home with a sick one or losing a house to the choice of paying a doctor over a mortgage.

This child will see her young mom date a guy and hang with them in the desperate attempt to find a dad, to find any man that would not only want mom but them too. They will move from one apartment to another, one guy to another. Finding out that the "only one thing" is all fine and dandy but the tag a long had strings permanently attached. They come in and out of this child's life like a whisper and a promise but then when they have the second take, it turns out they were just hearing things.

Then when they are sitting in their 9th grade class talking about how their teacher is the same age as their mom and passign around their ultrasounds, the teacher says it is funny how a teenager can have a parent that is less than thirty years old.

And then it comes to me . . . It is all they know. That is why they are showing me ultrasounds of thier baby and thinking that is is alright.

I can't condone the behavior. I can feel happy or congratulate them for their baby like I would for my brother or my colleague or the neighbor that just got married and their degree from college. I bring myself to smile or say that the baby looks good. I can't say that I am happy for them. I can't say congratulations. I know. I know already that it will be hard.

It will be hard for them and their child.

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