Infidelity is the ultimate act of betrayal to a relationship. Infidelity affects so many more than the two people involved in the act of unfaithfulness. Whether you are a married couple, or living together, a breach of trust has occurred. Friends and family are likely to take sides and soon, the war is on.

Sadly, that war often involves children. Innocent children that are wondering why? Why did dad or mom cheat on dad or mom? What is going to happen to me? Often there is a big custody battle and the poor innocent children are pulled in many different directions.

If you decide to forgive your spouse or partner, will you ever be able to trust them again? Will the relationship ever rekindle the romance that once was? Will you ever be able to forget what you found out?

As adults we should be able to sit down and decide what we want for ourselves and our lives. When we choose, often in the heat of the moment, to be unfaithful to a spouse or partner, we are making a decision for both parties.

Not only have you breached a trust with your spouse or partner, you have also set an example for your children. You have opened yourself up for the possibility of disease and perhaps even ruined your life and that of many others. Explaining this to friends, family, and your own children can be the most difficult part of infidelity.

With a no-win situation, you have in a short moment of pleasure, destroyed your own life, those around you and the other person's life, as well.

I knew a woman once who trusted her spouse implicitly. If he happened to be late coming home from work, he always had a good reason. One day, during a routine pelvic examination the woman's doctor found lesions that led her to be tested for herpes. The woman went home from her doctor visit devastated. What's worse, she was pregnant.

Her spouse denied any wrong-doing and accused her of being the one who was unfaithful. The woman had never been with another man. It turned out that the woman had a full-blown case of herpes aggravated by her pregnancy. She later found out her husband had not been working late at all; rather, he had a mistress on the other side of town. Though the husband did not have an active case of herpes, he had a latent case of herpes and the mistress also had herpes.

This woman, being a Godly woman, prayed and agonized over her decision. Should she stay with her spouse, or let him go and raise her child on her own? It was a long and agonizing decision. One that had her spouse been faithful to her, she need never have had to make. In a moment's passion, he had created a bad situation for this woman and the child, as well as for himself. Being a pillar in the community, he was under close scrutiny.

Infidelity destroyed this man's life, and the lives of many of those surrounding him. He thought he had gotten away with his secret. In fact, he had only compounded his unhappiness by his infidelity. Instead of working through his issues with just his spouse, he had involved many others and now had many fences to mend.

Infidelity is a dangerous thing and often leaves many shattered lives around it. It does not fix anything and can only make matters worse. Where there were once only a few problems, it often leaves problems tenfold of the original. It's not worth it in the long run.

Learn more about this author, Linda L Kinyon.
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