by Kamelia Morgan

Created on: May 17, 2009

I do not believe that couples communication classes are worth taking. I am married, and have been for the past 7 years, and my husband and I have been to counseling, psychotherapy and communication classes- surprisingly, there was no positive jolt in our relationship. The more frequent we went, the more we fought, and argued. I acknowledge that communication is crucial in breaking down language barriers whereby, coming to a concrete agreement and solution to some issues, but most people's problems stem way beyond communication. Firstly, both individuals have to be willing and open to sacrifice in order to accomplish a positive change in their relationships. Most often, couples go to these classes and/or couples counseling for the wrong reasons- mainly thinking or believing that if they can just get each other to say what is on their minds, everything will be ok. Some individual problems progress deeper than many couples anticipate- much more pressing than any communication class could fix. If both are not willing to compromise, then couples classes will definitely not help in the strengthening of their partnership. In some ways it may help...to certain extents, depending on the individual and the nature or level at which the problem ranges- but the first thing is to figure out the history behind one's relationship, and what problems have arisen whilst couples have been together or whilst copulating. When my husband and I went to theses classes, I was not the only one who had a barricade up, he did as well; it could never be penetrated, why? Because I, was still holding grudges for things that had happened to me, inflicted by him in the past, and he was angry that I keep bringing up the past or point out his faults in the present day. For some communication classes would be the ideal solution- but for those like my husband and I, and others like us, who always have to win in every argument that arises, or prove whose point is more feasible or plausible than the other's point of view... it never ends!

The history behind ones relationship, as well as what's currently going on, is essential in deciphering whether communication may be the couple's dilemma, or something greater that demands greater more serious actions and solutions. Some individuals may have had times when they have communicated their needs and desires clearly to their partners to the point of tears, but to no avail. For communication classes to prove effective, it depends on whether the couple

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