by Kamelia Morgan

Created on: May 15, 2009   Last Updated: July 28, 2009

There are many who believe and perceive marriage as a joke, a game, something to be taken for granted- why? Because each of us possesses the choice of either leaving our spouses or divorcing them- if it is proven that they lack the ability or potential to satisfy our needs. We then insist on making our own rules to fulfill whatever craving that has taken complete control over our will, morals and spirituality. Individuals assume that their marriage will be a successful one as long as they call the shots, as long as they are in control. Many have lost their way, and thereby, have completely forgotten the right path that led them to communicating and promising their vows to their spouses initially. It is clearly evident that when man incorporates their own ideas of what constitutes a marriage, they in turn lose the ideal meaning behind the law which instituted the concept of marriage through the biblical texts, as well as what is generally expected of us in our marriages in order for it to be flourish. Many do not understand that the bible is there to instruct us on how to live, and what is acceptable to God.

Having thought that one's way is the best way to counteract the stresses and tests of marriage, some end up leading themselves as well as others astray. Most wives permit their husbands to perform certain actions mainly because they are thinking that, that is their husband, and if you can't do any and everything with the person you vowed to love and cherish for the rest of life then who will you do it with?! However, most men believe and take this compromise as an invitation to be unclean, live out their fantasies or expect their wives to submit to the filthiness which they have brought into the marriage. Wives in turn, expect that the way they lived prior to being married should be accepted by their husbands when the eventually get married. We always believe we are familiar enough with the people we get married to, until we are actually married to them and living under the same roof whilst sharing the same space. Spouses generally cannot hide their faults or flaws in this setting, because everything is now illuminated. Many of us are not use to this type of life so we either sacrifice to please our spouse or we pretend to be someone or something that we aren't. It will not suffice in putting up pretenses, because sooner or later you are going to be found out and then hurt the person you are married to, thereby resulting in an argument or dislike for one's

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