by Joe Brooks

Created on: May 15, 2009

On the ordinary human's love for pain, or; why won't they read the FAQ's, anyway? With a secondary consideration of why rats are still with us, despite millennia of our efforts at eradication, and may remain after we are gone.

Scenario One:

Human A approaches a device, setup, or gizmo. Human A decides to give it a try.

Human A: Hmmm... Never saw one like this before.

I wonder... Zzzzzzt!

Wow! What the... Zzzzzzzzt!

C'mon now, it's just a... Zzzzzzt!

Owwww!

Human A sees Human B walking by. Human A calls out to Human B.

Hey! Take a look at this thing. There's like a button here, and when you... Zzzzzzzt!

Human B: Really? I had one like that once, and... Zzzzzzzt!

Wait a minute; I remember now, you just... Zzzzzzzzzt!

No, that wasn't it. It was the other way... Zzzzzzzt!

Owwww!

Human C approaches, is flagged down by A and B.

Humans A and B explain their problems.

Human C examines the device, points to an inscription above the button:

Warning! Do not touch! Electric shock hazard!

Human C then points out another sign below the device:

For safe maintenance, disable this device by pulling lever. (arrow points to lever)

Human C nods to A and B, continues on his way.

Human A: Who has time to read all that? All I wanted was to ... Zzzzzzzt!

Human B: Yeah! I've been working with these since I was a kid, and... Zzzzzzt!

Human A and Human B: Owwww!

Scenario Two:

Rat A: I see an unknown. I will examine it... Zzzzzzt!

After backing off and observing for a considerable time, Rat A approaches the device cautiously, whiskers extended, alert and ready to flee... zzz...

Rat A: Here is danger without reward. I will avoid it.

Rat A bypasses the device, sees a second unknown object.

Approaching with caution, Rat A extends whiskers, lightly brushes object.

Encouraged by lack of negative consequences, and smelling food nearby, Rat A pushes gently on the object with his nose.

Click - chunk, a greenish pellet drops out of an aperture.

Rat A: Ah, a food pellet! I will enjoy it.

Rat A continues pushing and consuming until satiated.

Rat B, a female, approaches.

Rat A assumes non-threatening posture, indicates readiness to share food and socialize.

Rat B, assured by A's posture and presence, seeks out device and feeds successfully.

With hunger satisfied, they mate.

Rat A continues journey through life, cautiously on the lookout for opportunity.

Rat B settles down near the food source to produce and raise a large family.

No doubt there will be a Rat C along in due time.

So now, have we learned anything by reading this story, Humans?

Zzzzzzzzt!

Learn more about this author, Joe Brooks.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.