by Nicole H

Created on: February 01, 2007   Last Updated: November 13, 2009

Victims of abuse go through many emotions: Fear, Guilt, Anger, Shame, Trust issues, depression, the list can be a long one. Truth is no matter what kind of abuse, be it: Physically, sexually, or verbally. In the long run there are usually specific emotions they all have in common.

The truth of the matter is no one really knows what it's like to be a victim of abuse unless they have experienced it for themselves. Some people may have witnessed abuse and can sympathize, but they can never really feel what the abused is feeling.

In many cases family and friends of a person who is in an abusive relationship will try and convince them to leave the abuser, but this usually doesn't work. As a person being abused usually has a strong connection to the person doing the hurting. It can be hard for the victim to admit that there is something wrong and in some cases they feel there isn't anything better. This is because their self-esteem has taken a hit for the worse.

Though family and friends know other wise, they really just need to be supportive. They need to listen and show that they do care. If possible get the victim the help they need, such as medical support.

The best moment through all of this is when a victim realizes they are being hurt. If lucky they finally see what everyone else has been seeing all along. Realization comes when the victim remembers all the excuses they came up with for the abuser and sees how torn up inside they truly are because of what the person has done to them. They see that it is possible for them to have a better life.

In addition: Victims may not just be looking out for themselves when they get the courage to leave. They may have a child with them or other relative that is getting hurt mentally or physically during the process, this can sometimes help move the course of action along more quickly.

In the end after the steps have been taken to leave the negative person that has caused so much turmoil, there is only one thing left to do. This is the healing process. Through supportive people, groups, and networks. A person is able to talk and share their feelings. Acknowledging what has happened is a great way of coping. Taking time to enjoy what life has to offer again and doing the things that make one happy is a great way to move fourth. In addition the arts are also a great way to express feelings that can sometimes be difficult to express through speaking. Writing in a journal, writing poetry, drawing, painting, music, singing, are all great ways of healing.

Once this is done a person can move forward in life. Start fresh, almost like being given a second chance. One that is filled with good people, happiness, and success, what ever a person's goals may be. But most of all: love, respect, and consideration.

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