by Lynne Renaud

Created on: May 12, 2009   Last Updated: May 14, 2009

My husband was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder a few years ago, when he was in his thirties. Growing up, he was described as "hyper" and his report cards always seemed to have the statement "could do better." While he is very intelligent, with a near genius level I.Q., it took him longer than others to graduate from university. The one thing that having a diagnosis of Adult ADD has given us is an understanding of where his behaviors are coming from, why he has difficulty with certain tasks, and strategies to cope with these issues.

Ever since we started going out, my husband has always been a little hyper at times, at other times very laid back. He had the tendency to procrastinate and blurt things out in conversation that would take me off guard. He would lose things and forget things. If it was not written down, chances were pretty good that he would forget about it. There were times when he would be completely absorbed in something, particularly a video game, and on the upside, he would always show up early for appointments or meetings. We never really thought about it until he began hearing and reading about ADD. It was not until he began researching it on his own that he began to suspect that maybe he was not just lazy or scatter-brained, that maybe there was a legitimate reason for the way he was.

We had been together for several years when he first told me that he suspected that he had ADD. We read books, researched on the Internet, and talked about it. I even went to the psychologist with him to give my perceptions of his symptoms. One of the diagnostic tools that were used was a questionnaire that consisted of 18 yes/no questions. To determine if the individual has ADD, there must be at least 12 of the criteria markers met. Some of the questions dealt with aspects that someone else other than the patient would perceive, while other questions dealt with aspects that the patient would be able to perceive that someone else would not be able to answer to. Interestingly, between his answers and my answers, he hit all 18 of the criteria. That clinched the result of Adult Diagnosed ADD.

It took a while for both of us to come to terms with his diagnosis. On the one hand, there was the sense of relief that we finally knew for sure that he does indeed have ADD. There was finally an explanation for his feelings and his behaviors. It became a case of "he has ADD, that explains things now." On the other hand, there was also a sense of disappointment.

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