by Irene Graham

Created on: May 09, 2009

As I sit here tonight reading about dysfunctional mother and daughter relationships and how bad they are; or how hard it is to maintain any kind of a relationship with the mother, I can only ponder over my own relationship with my own mother; and the relationship with my own two daughters,.

I certainly can't say I had a "rosy colored" relationship with my mother while I was growing up. I think the hardest thing I had was in forgiving my mother when she allowed my father to beat me with the metal hook on a razor strap right in front of her. She never lifted a finger to stop him, nor comfort me after wards, in fact she was colder more then she ever had been to me. Why did I get such a beating? My older sister told my Dad I was kissing a boy! But yet when my uncle was kissing me, patting me on my butt in front of him, he didn't lift a finger but to glare at me. I guess he thought I was the one that encouraged such behavior from the uncle. (this uncle was only one of the two that molested me, and they were my mother's brothers).

However, even though these horrible things happened to me, I can honestly say I had a good relationship with my Mom later on in life. I had a fair relationship with my Dad. It wasn't the kind of relationship I wanted with him, but it was better then what others had with their parents. I never saw my parents fight ever; they always provided for me, even though we were considered "poor." There was five kids all together, even though the two younger ones were sixteen year younger then me, and my younger brother was eight years younger then me. We didn't do much in the entertainment field, like movies; and we didn't go much any where. My Dad didn't believe in eating "out". He felt eating was to be done at home, so if you wanted a hamburger, you cooked one and ate it at home.

When I got married the first time, my parents didn't really approve of him. I really didn't care, as I was three months pregnant. I actually was a good girl growing up.(I didn't give my parents much heart ache). This was a mistake, but I kept her. She is now my oldest, and I am very thankful I kept her. I went on to have three more kids, and the youngest being a daughter.

I married a wife abuser the first time. He was more abusive to my kids then me, but became verbally and emotionally abusive as the years went by. During those nineteen years of marriage, I was able to have a good relationship with my Mother. Even my Father before he died. In fact, my mother and I

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