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How to write a college paper in one night

by Matt Bird

My advice? Don't.

If I could get away with those three words I would. Writing an entire paper in one night is a bad, bad idea. That said it's sometimes the only option available to a student, and in those cases all may seem lost. But it's not - as long as you're prepared for zero sleep, anyway.

Generally college papers require you to focus on one specific area. So, regardless of the topics available, you're going to need sources that center on that area. With any luck the teacher has given you a focused topic; if not, though, you're going to have to come up with something. The first thing that pops into your mind is what you should go with, as you hardly have the time to come up with something better.

Your first step after deciding on a topic should be a trip to the library. You need a thesis, after all - or you generally will, anyway - and books are the best place to start. Most libraries I've seen stay open until 9, and college libraries may remain open even longer. If you can get away with staying in one all night I'd suggest doing so, as you'll eliminate the number of potential distractions, plus you'll have access to all the research material you'll need.

So. You've been to the library and you've got plenty of books on your subject matter. Get as many as you can, as quickly as you can, and head back to your work area. If the library wasn't open, don't despair: there's still another option, and you'll want to use it regardless of whether you got books or not - the Internet.

Head online and start looking for research databases. If you're in college or university their library website will PROBABLY provide a listing of research databases teeming with good resources on virtually any topic. Head on and start hunting down more articles relating to your topic. Note, however, that many entries may be snippets: and you don't want snippets, you want full articles. As such you'll want to do an advanced search on your topic, and tick off 'Full articles only' for search results. Don't waste time with useless little reviews and portions of articles.

Right. So. You've got your books, you've got your online articles, you've got a topic. Now you need a thesis to work around, and you have no idea what it is. Chances are good the amount of reading material you've amassed is looking horrid: but take heart, you won't have to read it all.

For books, finding exactly what you want to read about is as close as the back of the book. Any self-respecting non-fiction book will have an appendix filled with the book's contents. Go through, find all those entries that are relevant to you, skip to the pages you need and start writing down the information you find. I'd suggest writing it directly into Word rather than into your notebook, as you can sometimes transform those notes into full sentences for your paper with minimum effort.

Online documents are even easier to skim. Generally they're shorter anyway, so if you're not TOO pressed for time you might be able to read an article or two. Barring that, however, most online documents come in .pdf format, and .pdfs are search-able. Use the Find option to hunt down specific keywords, likely the same you'd be searching for in a book.

As you go through the material you're going to find certain patterns emerging, and you'll likely start to formulate an opinion on the material. And guess what? So long as you have sufficient backing material, that opinion can be a thesis. As soon as something viable pops into your head WRITE IT DOWN, just in case you accidentally lose it partway into the night. Everything of value needs to be typed out immediately, for with an all-nighter you're likely to start forgetting material. Make sure it's all in hard copy.

You have your information. Now you need to organize it. How you'll do that depends heavily on the subject matter, though I find many papers can be written in a roughly chronological order. (Most of my papers could, anyway.) Make sure each paragraph is devoted to a single point that ties back to your thesis, which of course you need to state in your first few paragraphs. Don't try to get too fancy with your wording, and make sure you don't go off on rants or tangents - stick to your material as much as possible. One handy thing to do is to make extensive use of quotations, as they'll often make your argument better than you ever will, plus they can help move your word count along.

With any luck you'll manage to bang out something with a decent introduction, body and conclusion. You're not done there, though: now you need to edit the thing. And as tired as you may be, you HAVE to edit it. You WILL have made mistakes, and some things won't make sense. Read the whole thing over, use the spell checker, and fix accordingly. Then, when you wake up in the morning, do it again. Maybe even a few times. Have someone else read it before you hand the thing in, too, just in case you continued to make mistakes.

All done? Not yet. You still need to cite your sources. And while this can seem like a painful process, there are online services that can do it all for you in the proper format. Which you'll use is up to your teacher's preferred citation method. Use Google, work up your bibliography, edit IT to make sure it's all right, and then, once all is said and done, toss in your paper.

There. You've done a research paper in one night. Don't expect a great grade, but expect a better one than you would've have managed without a plan. (Again, DON'T DO THIS!)

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