by Lynette Alice

Created on: May 08, 2009   Last Updated: December 26, 2009

The keys to establishing a healthy lesbian relationship are for the most part the same as those needed to establish a healthy relationship between two men or a man and a woman. It goes without saying there are some things which add a little extra challenge to creating a healthy dynamic, but in reality there is no need to make it any more complex than necessary. To properly identify the key factors that go into creating a healthy lesbian relationship is to proceed step by step and remove the mystery and myth from it all.

The most important aspect of any relationship is trust. It doesn't matter if you're talking about lesbians or Martians, without trust there is nothing. Trust is what allows two people to be absent from one another without going into mental fits over what they might be doing. Trust is what allows one partner to watch the other enjoy talking to or spending time with someone else as a friend and not experience jealous fits. Trust is what is necessary to honestly feel love for one another.

Respect is a huge factor as well. If there is no mutual respect the relationship is never level. Someone always feels as if they are above the other in some way and a healthy relationship can never develop. Respect for one another is what allows open honest communication. Without respect, there is no relationship, there is merely a pairing of two people in which one dictates to the other what to do and think. Anyone that has been in a pairing like that knows it is not a healthy relationship lesbian or otherwise.

Other important traits necessary in all relationships are of course, love, loyalty, and honor. They along with trust and respect are the foundation that a relationship is built upon. With that said there are a few unique aspects of the lesbian relationship which must be present in order for it to remain healthy and capable of continuing to grow and thrive.

Each person should be out of the closet, or willing to deal with the fact that one person may not be out. It may not sound like a major issue unless you have lived through a relationship dealing with that dynamic. If both partners are out, there is no reason to feel compelled to keep a low profile. When one partner is out and the other is in what usually winds up happening sooner or later is a strong feeling of resentment manifesting. The out partner often begins the partner that is in the closet for not coming out so they can be together publicly without worry. They start to resent not being able to

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