by Erin Cole

Created on: May 08, 2009

Unspoken Bonds

As the plane dipped beneath the layers of lucent haze, my heart sank with it. The thought of returning home left me anxious and depressed since bitter words had escaped between my father, Hank, and me just before I left for service. During my four-year deployment in Afghanistan and Iraq, he never wrote to me once, though a part of me expected that. It seemed nothing I did was ever good enough for him. I thought enlisting in the Army would make him proud, but instead he accused me of running away from my problems. And so for once, I did.

An old friend from high school greeted me with a hearty embrace outside the airport. Sean looked the way he always did: flannel shirt, ripped jeans and soccer shoes, except now his eyes were heavy with dark bags and a thicker layer of flesh wrapped around his midriff, both products of having a kid, I suspected.

Good to see you, bro, I said, clutching his hand in mine.

He gave me a solid pat on the back. It's been too long, man, he replied.

We gathered my burlap bags and headed to the parking lot. I fought my instincts to keep vigilant of my surroundings, but sitting in Sean's Camero again, listening to classic rock, good memories we shared together came flooding back to me. The freedom to do whatever we wanted, whenever we wanted, which we usually pissed away doing nothing, surfaced the carefree days of my youth that I had unknowingly took for granted.

So, what are your plans? Sean asked.

Get out of the house first, I said. Doubt me and my old man are going to get along any better than we used to.

I'd love to let you stay with us, but with the baby and all, Linda would have a cow, he said, smacking a pack of cigarettes against his thigh.

That's alright; I don't plan to stay there long anyway. I accepted a cigarette from him. I wasn't a regular smoker, but in the Army it seemed almost everyone smoked whether it was a habit or not. I away from the icy air vents, even though it was a humid summer day in Portland and I was fully clad in uniform. Probably work for a little bit, then maybe go to school, study engineering.

Sounds big.

Easy. I took a drag of my smoke. Life's a cake walk here. In Fallejha, it's like a battle of gladiators only the brave and lucky survive.

And the quick ones, he said pointing his cigarette at me.

No, I was lucky lucky to be released.

Well, I haven't had a decent night's sleep in five months if it makes you feel any better. Lily wakes

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