There is no single and isolated reason why couples are unfaithful. Reasons why couples are unfaithful are varied and multifaceted as they include inner and outside pressures along with conflicting needs and desires that pull couples into cheating. Any one or a combination of these reasons could make one vulnerable should they find themselves in a situation where being unfaithful is feasible. One of the main reasons why couples are unfaithful is loss of community support. Our friends and acquaintances no longer care that much about our moral behavior as we are no longer our brother's and sister's keepers.
Below listed are some of the main reasons why couples are unfaithful and brief explanation of each one of them:
1. Loss of community support
Our churches lost their moral clout as community pressure and community support have been withheld from us or is practically non-existent. The loss of community life means that the burden of faithfulness is now with the partners themselves. It is up to somebody's moral and character strength as to whether they will be faithful or not.
2. Overemphasis on sexuality in our society
We place too much emphasis on personal fulfillment through marriage and obviously sexual fulfillment is a large part of the marriage package. We are expected to cultivate, celebrate, and fully enjoy sexual life for our own sake. Our environment no longer supports marriage but on the contrary pushes people away from it. Everyone is aware that our society places a premium on sexual fulfillment and not on stable institutions. We are taught there personal fulfillment is not possible without sexual satisfaction. Quite often media exposure urges us to consider our sexual desires as if they are our sexual rights. But, once the experience gets dull or frustrating, some people find that marriage is not, after all, romantic enough. They decide to cross the line when the flames of passion have turned to the ashes of resentment.
3. Sexual convenience
We are mobile which gets us places where we can not be seen. Married people are meeting many more sexually interesting partners than ever before. Men and women meet on a more frequent and equal basis and can pay for the secret lunches and motel rooms. Women are also freed from the fear of pregnancy as there is the pill. Convenient adultery was never closer to us.
4. Anger
Anger represents sick pressure towards unfaithfulness as it uses one person sexually in order to punish another person. Anger pushes people toward an act that can punish the person toward whom their anger is directed. The angry person is not falling in love with a third person but is falling in anger against his spouse. A husband may feel that he is always initiating and giving and never receiving anything in return. A wife may feel that her husband has been insensitive or brutal.
5. Perfectionism
Every wife or husband must be ravishing, romantic, strong, tender, understanding, and competent. If this expectation is not met, it leaves a person with a rage and eventually leads into an affair.