by Deborah Steinmetz

Created on: May 06, 2009

Once upon a time

The maiden Missy she was merry

Prince Filbert was tall, and trim and gorgeous

But alas he was a fairy.

Not the kind that tinkered

along with little Bell

But the kind that wore dresses

And liked to kiss boys And well

no more.. can I tell.

The beautiful maiden, wept with grief

Her Fairy Prince had stolen her joy

This man who was betrothed to her

Simply, loved another boy.

So she began to wonder

What would become of her

No Prince, no castle, a spinster she'll be

And no happily ever after.

She ran to the ancient great Hall

Where they kept the fairy tale stories

In a panic she searched for others in history

That possibly had her same worries.

Cindy.. Snow... Beauty.. Rapunzel

Well, they all got their men

They were hes, those hes liked shes

And, they all, of course, wanted Women!

Maiden Missy, she got pissy

She looked up to the sky

Fell to her knees, Waling

Why now, why me, why...why?

And as she lowered her head

To her great surprise

A Voice came down from Heaven and said

" Now Missy, wipe your eyes."

I sent you Arthur, you said too macho

I sent you Charming too

I sent you Robin from the Hood

But the homie , didn't do it for you.

I sent you Princes one by one

Some valiant others wealthy

I sent you Shrek, but you actually said

the fat, green boy didn't look healthy.

I searched the land near and far

And to find them was pretty tricky

But you cast them aside one by one

Because my dear you're too damned picky.

Now, I will try just one more time

We can leave Filbert alone

But if you cast this next one aside

Then my dear, you're on your own.

Missy wanted to argue

She couldn't just let it be

She said She's the best, those men were pests

just like the Musketeers three

The earth began to rumble

the winds began to roar

"Missy", growled the voice above.

I'll find you someone you can adore.

Excitement filled her heart

She'd finally have her love

Someone that she finally deserves

Sent from up above.

Missy wiped her eyes,

She thanked the Voice above

And she sat in that spot 'til she perished

Awaiting her perfect love.

The morals of this story are quite simple.

1 - When asking the powers of the Universe for love, do not omit the word 'tale' in your request for a fairy tale Prince.

2 - Never argue with a voice that comes out of the sky and promises to find you a true love.

3 - Narcissism (self love) may leave you a very lonely Princess!

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