by Franchesca Bisignano

Created on: May 05, 2009

Understanding abuse victims take a lot of understanding and compassion. It is important to not judge an abuse victim. Unless you have been an abuse victim yourself it will be hard to understand their actions and feelings.

Many abuse victims will protect their abusers. They will also stay with someone that is abusing them. Abuse may be all the victims know. Many people who are in abusive relationships were also abused as children. It takes a lot of strength and time to break the cycle of abuse for both the abuser and the victim. The sad reality is that most domestic abuse victims will go back to their abuser. Abusers know what to say in order to have their victim return. If a victim choices to go back to their abuser there is very little you can do other than be a supportive friend.

It is important for an abuse victim to have a safe place to go. You can be that person's safe place. It is important to be able to be supportive without putting down their partner. While you may think they are the scum of the earth the victim is still in love with the abuser.

Every abuse victim deals with the abuse in different ways. It is important to be supportive well also allowing the victim to deal with the abuse. Pushing someone to leave their abusive partner will just push them farther away from you not them.

It is important to have a lot of compassion when dealing with an abuse victim. Compassion means understand how that victim may be feeling. It is important to not tell an abuse victim that you know how they feel if you yourself has not been through abuse.

A person who is abused will have a variety of emotions that they feel. It is important to allow victims to express their feelings in ways that are productive. It is important to not encourage victims to express their feelings in negative or counterproductive ways.

Healing from any type of abuse will take time. There is no set time of recovery that a person needs to recover. The amount needed to recover will depend on what type of abuse it was as well as how long the abuse took place. Recovery time also depends on the person and will vary from victim to victim. No victim will "get over" their abuse it is something that will stay with them forever. Although the abuse will not go away or the feeling associated with it in time it will get easier to deal with.

The best way to understand abuse victims is to have compassion and understand while being supportive.

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